S 3513 
R35 E9 

320 

'^"^ ^ eriences Of A Greenhorn 



And Other Poems 



/ -ll 



EXPERIENCES OF A GREENHOliN 

and 

other Poems 

By ReT, Fr-^ Graufham. Danbury, Iowa 



To my beloved amd decesased parents to whom 
under God I owe very much- 



Copyrighted 






E:ipe:iencc3 of a Greenhcrn 



A^ 



4'T 



INTRODUCTION 

This is n:y first real literary effort "hence my 
prayers and my heart go with this little book. Be- 
ing a Minister of the Gospel I would freely state to 
all my readers that my one and only purpose in 
writing poems as in my pulpit orations is to glorify 
my Maker. My "Experiences of a Greenhorn" are 
meant to cover my experiences th^ first year I was 
in the United States of America but the conditions 
pictured are before the automobiloa were popular 
D.nd many people still used horses as a means of 
transportation. If any of my pjoems would seem to 
be based on personal incidents f would say I am a 
close student of human nature and in ail my writings 
I try to picture things as they are, not as wo would 
always have them. 

The Author 
Danbury, Iowa Aug. 1. 1920 

Copyrighted August, 1920 by Rev. F. Grantham 



©CI.A597302 
5^f -7 1920 



r4 



And Other Poems 




THE AUTHOR 



Experiences of a GreetiliortE 



THE EXPERrEKCES OF A GREENHORN 



I am Eng'lish: As a yoUKg- greenhorn 
All trim and neat, of beard well shorn. 
My native shore I left one morn 

The dear Hon'c-Land 
A mother's heart was sadly torn 

Such grief to stand- 



Forgive me if I seem to say 

Too much of her; She was niy stay 

Throughout the years. And still today 

I seem to hear 
These words "Do right my boy alway" 

From one so dear- 



And in my dreams I see her face 

So sweet, though cares have left their trace. 

And age is coming on apace 

Her hair is white 
If seventy years must end her race 

It is in sight 

My father on my leaving there 
Was seated in the old arm-chair 
Which he U3ed for many a year 

— God bless my Dad 
Choking he said as fell a tear 

"Good-by my lad" 



And Other Poems 

His hand held mine; With age it shook 

I could not in that kind face look 

My eyes grew dim. I seemed to choke 

— Nought could I say — 
So siezed my suit-case and betook 

Myself away. 



I could not well afford to quake 

For all my future was at stake 

Eu: sometimes yet my heart will ache 

And tears will come 
When I allow myself to take 

A glimpse of home. 



The pain of parting thus was o'er 

And fast the train steamed toward the shore 

Where ships are numbered by the score; 

As one thats dazed 
I sat. My eyes fixed on the floor 

Or outward gazed. 

Long years "abroad" I would reniaia 
Ere I would see my folks again 
Or ride upon a British train — 

Farewell ye all. 
Yet antidotes remove the bane 

Of Duties call. 



When Liverpool I reached t'was late 

To "tip" I did not hesitate 

So found a room that was first-rate 

With good clean bed. 
At six I rose, my breakfast ate 

And off I sped. 



P Exiici-ienccs of a Greenhorn 

The city was a busy place 

But toward the docks I turned my face, 

A ferry steamer with good grace 

Bore me away 
With folks of nearly every race 

Where our ship lay. 



Words fail to tell that good ships fame 
Come storm or calm she rode the same 
The Oceanic was hor ame 

Sirong built oi steel 
A floating palaro xvoc ) claim 

I'^roni deck to ];o3l 



That day we sailed. Bat en the land 
Something took pla':o both good and g'-and 
A crowd with hand i:e-> chiefs in hand 

Fond farewells waved 
With prayers and wishes from that batid 

The sea was braved. 



My state-room, number eighty-four. 
Was shared alike by three men more. 
A kind Canuck, a Scotchman poor, 

A Welshman hale. 
That night I thought as oft before 

Of Jonahs whale. 



Though fitful sleep prolonged the night 
The morning brought a glorious sight: 
Old Queenstown bathed in morning light 

Was at my feet. 
My eyes I feasted with delight 

On such a treat. 



And Other Poems 

Her changeless hills, bleak, bold but grand ' 
Which met my gaze on every hand, 
Challenging admiration stand 

Throughout the years. 
Who does not love brave Erin's Land: 

And weep her tears. 



\7e well nigh spent a full half -day 
In what is known as Queenstown Bay. 
Mail sacks galore were stowed away 

In the ships hold. 
Four hundred girls came on to stay 

— Not very old. 



I thought of mothers weeping sore 
Who would the Virgin's aid implore. 
Of what the New World had in store; 

—How in The States 
Some of these girls would fall before 

White slavers baits. 



While yet on board I oft passed through 
Experiences both strange and new; 
But I was with a pleasant crew 

And jolly crowd 
Of passengers. The sick were few, 

The laughter loud. 

The following story has been told 
(To seme its new, to others old) 
A woman sick, inclined to scold 

Said to her man, 
'IBring up my old black shawl, I'm cold. 

Quick Jonathon." 



Experiences of a Greenhorn 

The good man hastened to obey 
But forthwith turned the other way 
His stomach heaved, He tried to say 

— In prose not rhyme. 
''Your old black shawl, excuse me pray. 

May come next time.' 



Twas what you'd call a pleasant trip 
So sweetly sailed that noble ship 
Somet'mes she'd rise and then would dip 

In sea-gull fashion. 
And would the oceans bosom rip 

As in a passion. 



My soul still cleaves the ocean deep. 
To see her foaming white-caps leap 
Into the air like playful sheep 

Reflection brought. 
Of mysteries she still doth keep 

From deepest thought. 

Nor was that all it spoke to me 
It told of Gods Immensity. 
Of Him who on Lake Galilee 

Controlled her might 
Yes, He was God as He must be — 

God Infinite. 

That voyage passed. "Land now in sight" 
The watch gave out. This did oxciie 
All those on board. With all our might 

We each one j^azed 
And when we saw land to our right 

A cheer was raised. 



And Other Poems 

Grip-sacks were packed. We all v/ere ^^lad 
To get in port. But those who had 
Forgot to tip — An old time fad 

— Perhaps unfair 
Met stewards faces long and sad 

Most everywhere. 



Some other troubles were in store 
Before we were allowed on shore. 
Some were so angry that they swore 

The Customs flayed. 
And others mercy did implore, 

But each one paid. 

These men were kind enough to ni- 
The one who came my goods to see 
Was fair as :.ny man could be 

From first to last. 
I was O. K'd without a fee 

And safely passed. 

Another took me by the hand 

And welcomed me to this great land 

On learning I would join a band 

Of worthy preachers. 
Who always for the right must stand 

— Truths ablest teachers. 

His kindly words did me much good 

It seemed as though a kind of load 

Fell from my heart. He knew they would 

To faith give strength. 
And thus bear fruit; just as the bud 

The flower at length. 



10 Experiences cf a Greenhorn 

We slowly crept into the dock. 

White handkerchiefs; a g'oodly stock 

Glad welcomes wrvcd. They seemed to meek 

My lonely heart. 
A foreigner, alone. The shock 

Some fears did start. 



I disembarked in New York City 
£cme p?.rt3 of which are very pretty. 
Seine folks there assume they're witty. 

Quite freely they 
Will tell ycu almost any ditty 

'BGub where to £t 7, 



All such dispise, then you're all right. 
Seme good hotel seek for the night. 
May save ycu from a sorry plight 

If you sleep sound. 
Who cares to stay where bed-bugs bite 

And thieves abound. 



My stay in New York being brief 

I got around quick as a thief 

The sights to see. Nor came to grief 

By being lost. 
Thp.t which is easy, my belief 

To one "Just crossed" 



But briefly here I now will try 

To tell of blocks that scrape the sky. 

Some more than thirty stories high 

— They copy Babel. 
Can't be that all Heaven would fly 

If they were able. 



And Other Poems 11 

Seme were good souls whom I met there 
Who breathed the Name of God in prayer. 
And some their follies were laid bare. 

No intermission 
Vv^as heard between each loathsome swear. 

That is Perdition. 



So n:any things there please the eye 
Bssideo those blocks thst scrape the sky. 
Her crowded streets through which cars fly. 

Her cars upstairs. 
Her ferry boats; Her bridges high. 

Her cheerful airs. 



But all of these I left behind. 
To sleep awhile I had designed 
While on the train, hut still my mind 

Interested grew. 
In studies of a worthy kind — 

The World called New. 



And oft this thought passed through my hea.; 
As on and on so fast we sped. 
Is this the land of which I read 

So much at home ? 
Is this the land to which this said 

The millions come? 



I saw the farms the land which grace 
And towns with folks of every race. 
One day in Pittsburg. Quite a place 

My problem solved. 
And yet Chicago sets the pace 

I am resolved. 



12 Experiences cf a Gresnhorn 

Their lovely streets both straight and wide 
With crowds well dressed on every side. 
Prosperity did here abide 

The blind could see. 
To screw my courage up I tried 

Successfully. 

That trip was long. Three nights and days 
Passed ere these prairies met my gaze. 
The Middle-West is quite a ways. 

On Sunday morn 
I reached the Land of Oats and Maize; 

A young "Greenhorn" 

I sought my Superintendents home, 
At whose request I can:e to roam 
Across the rolling restless foam 

— No not in blindness. 
His v.-lfe, — blessings upon her come — 

Showed me great kindnesH 

I bathed. I dined. I went to bed. 
I know not if my prayers I said. 
I know I laid my tired head 

In sweet repose. 
I kncvv- full eighteen hours had sped 

When I rose. 



The following day I met this man. 
All ever me his eyes he ran. 
And smiling said "Perhaps I can 

Cf service be. 
Ycu are scarce familiar with our plan 

Of work" said he. 



Ard Oth-T Fo-i-t 



13 




14 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Forthwith the good man did proceed 
As elders will their flocks who lead 
I listened. It was clear I'd need 

These things to know. 
For ignorance no man should plead 

The law says so. 



The week passed by. In Church once more 
When I had got to stand before 
A congregation; as of yore 

The Good News spread. 
I took my stand upon that floor 

With puzzled head. 



I said: "Now brethren let us sing 

Of Christ Our Blessed Lord and King. 

Who did for us salvation bring 

With His Own Blood." 
It did'nt go with "No great swing 

And no one stood. 



I soon caught on; And so did they 
Things brightened from that very day 
They said "He has good things to say" 

And that was kind. 
Folks love to meet to sing and pray. 

I ever find. 



Thus I begun to work new ground. 
Somewhat surprised I straightway found 
To do my duty; get around 

I'd need a rig. 
Success; the goal of monarchs crowned, 

To me looked big. 



And Other Poems 15 

I hit upon a kind old gent 
Who gravely took of Sacrament 
A trait truly magnificient 

In any man. 
He seemed to be of good intent 

So my thoughts ran. 



Of that same man a horse I bought 
Convinced a lesson I had taught 
My people; whose good-will I sought, 

How faith thus winned. 
Instead they h'nted I v\^as caught 

And badly skinned 



Well let them talk of my old friend 

I'll trust his honor to the end 

And nothing shall my mind unbend 

From such a donor 
Eight royally did he befriend 

Both horse and owner. 



Besides the horse I bought that day 
I found him good in every way 
Was gentle kind and full of play 

Enjoyed good feed. 
In color was a pretty bay 

And had good speed. 



I loved that horse. He was my friend 
Companion, slave. His will would bend. 
He seemed half human to the end 

— Could almost speak. 
His rough old nose he loved to send 

Across my cheek. 



16 E ; c.Ienjcs cT a Grssnhorn 

I rode behind him many hours 
A3 one whose temper never sours 
When out in sunshine or in showers 

He went right on 
His bridie oft cdorned wdth flowers 

As laurels won. 



When summer came the days were grand 
'Till cyclones swept across our land 
Huge buildings like small grains of sand 

Were swept away. 
Stout hearts with such a storm at hand 

Still fear today. 



And heavy rains; They too were bad. 

As to the corn; The farmers had 

An anxious time. And all were glad 

The frost came late. 
Or else some folks would have been sad 

And mourned their fate. 



Nor did these troubles come alone 

A money panic made us groan. 

Twas caused by men with hearts of stone. 

By men who sin 
Who fain would have the world their own, 

And all fenced in. 



When times like these shall come again 
For come they will we all must ken, 
I have a word for tempted men. 

Tis simply this: 
God's providence is o'er us when 

Things go amiss 



And Ot:vy Pc 



17 




18 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

When Sprins: ccmes Ir.te; The Fall's likewise 
The corn crop light then prices rise. 
The op.ts are good and we surmise 

A brighter day. 
Experience makes us realize 

Things go that way. 



Hope will dispel the strongest fear 
Bid us believe the sky will clear 
The mists disperse, the sun appear. 

And we shall see 
Things better each suceeding year. 

"Land of The Free" 



Though some have called our scenery "Tame'' 
Large lakes, where fish both small and game 
Abound, whose woodland coasts I claim 

Are very sweet. 
For goodly farms Old Iowa's fame 

Cannot be beat. 



Cur corn fields waving in the air. 
Looking so noble grand and fair 
With any country will compare 

Let it be said. 
Eacii plant with haughty monarchs fair 

Lifts hierh its head. 



Ponds large and small around us lie. 
Wild ducks and geese o'er our heads fiy 
Where hunters go their luck to try 

— A happy band. 
As sportsman yet as preacher I 

Went gun in hand. 



And 0th 3r Poems ID 

That night I stayed out on a farm. 
We rose at five the ducks to harm 
And stole along lest we alarm 

And lose our prey 
But all cur tactics failed to charm 

— They got away. 



But be it to our credit paid 
When heme again at ten we made 
A rabbit and two ducks I laid 

Down on a sack. 
My friend with whom that night I stayed 

Killed one "Old Jack." 



Hunting the ducks is good clean sport 
The falling bird, the loud report 
What must it be to bring to port 

The wily deer. 
And even tJiough you danger court — 

The grizzly bear. 



Yet hunting has its cruel side 

For birds when wounded oft will hide 

And starve in pain, and so have died 

A lingering death. 
Why boast sportsman in thy pride, 

With heated breath. 



Just turn and read your "Bobby Burns" 
Whose mind to strange things often turns. 
See how in tenderness he yearns 

And fain would spare. 
That which the sportsman instinct spurns — 

"The Wounded Hare" 



20 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Thcugh this oi course meant some expense 

I h?.d to go to Conference. 

And tiu'.y failed to see the sense 

Of all things there 
I z;c ^t now. I was too dense 

Those things to square. 



5.'r.c3 tiu'-h Ts truth let truth be free, 
I car. net ?'ways serious be 
And sometimes when a joke I see 

I straightway spring it. 
Anncunce a hymn well knowing we 

Can never sing it. 



But when I to Our Conference went 

I £t:^.it9d cut with grave intent. 

Cn m?k!n-^' good my mind was bent 

I v/as groomed well. 
I hoped to meet that grand old gent 

— Bishop Goodsell. 



Foithv/ith I saw in this great land 
V/hore I had given heart and hand 
To preaching. Never work so grand 

Nor more sublir^te. 
It v/cu:d take grace to make me stand 

True all the time. 



Strpnge scenes of course; and furthermore 
Coiv.ir.ittees there I faced galore 
iZ aminations by the score 

Which were no snap. 
Dsbr:L?s there on the conference floor 

— Won by a lap. 



And Other Poems 21 

I h?A been told those who aspire 
To rise to charges graded higher 
Mu^t i:Y£t ieain how to pull the wire 

Which should not be 
In men whose works "Tried as by fire" 

At last shall be. 



IIciico I muit say a word right here 
Let Ecms be tempted pra'ps to sneer 
iho fellows made whom I met there 

A body fine. 
A sight which could not fail to cheer 

This heart of mine 



So many kind friends there I met 
Who have a place in my heart yet. 
To seme I feel I owe a debt 

Of gratitude. 
But cne thing I do forget 

Though it seem crude. 



The Bishop pleads "We need more men". 
Straightway the Elder takes his pen 
And writes most anywhere I ken, 

He is persistent. 
The Conference spoils his plans and then 

Seems inconsistent. 



The fact I was a "Candidate" 
Seme little interest did create 
It was predicted that my fate 

— Mid agitation — 
Would be decided should I state 

My education. 



Experiences of a Greenhorn 

To meet the needs I had prepared 
By strenuous effort. Nor had spared 
Myself. My ''Useful life had squared" 

By labor sweet. 
My flickering lamp my struggles shared 

"Fu mony a neet" 



The Conference doorway as you sea 
Is built of men. Say five or three 
Nailed fast with sense and charity 

In these mens eyes 
(And others judge by their decree) 

We fall or rise. 



These men I met. One took my side. 
To win for me he vainly tried 
The chairman sitting by my side 

A kind good man. 
With arguments he quick replied 

"Pass him who can" 



When on the floor the names were called 
(For Conference is with work enthralled) 
I knew my case would be forestalled 

With odium blended. 
For with these words I was black-balled 

"Not recommended" 



Discussion hot at once began. 

Some were "Against" some "For" "This man' 

With strong headwinds that race I ran. 

— Known to but few. 
My Superintendent — Marred his plan — ■ 

My name withdrew. 



And Other Poems 23 

Those honest men did me no wrong 
Not though their action may seem strong 
— They had not known me very long 

Hence I must wait 
And seek a place their ranks among 

Some later date 



But all the same I went to bed 

With sickened heart and aching head. 

The doctor called on me and said 

"Tis rest you need." 
When I was well three days had fled 

With lingering speed. 



Though fate at times may roughly shove 
The Church we still must serve and love. 
Tis to the world as was Noah's dove 

With olivo leaf. 

That know no grief. 
Tis nearest to the choirs above 



Some humorous things too happen there 
Clean jokes in which we all may share 
Good stories which the world can't spare 

And still be blesi. 
And lecturers from everywhere, 

The very best. 



A story here is versified, 

The moral too you'll find applied, 

A man his automobile tried 

To run one day 
When suddenly his engine died 

Home miles away. 



24 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

He cranked and cranked and cranked again 
Until his arm he held in pain 
And yet these efforts were in vain 

It would not budge. 
If home he made twas very plain 

He'd have to trudge. 



He stumbled on a nobler thought 

And quick it's inspiration caught 

A ranchers home he should have sought 

Without delay. 
His monkey wrench he had not brought 

Along that day. 



But when the ranchers home he found 
His question did the man astound: 
"Have you a monkey wrench around?" 

With scornful pride 
"Tis cattle ranch you whimpering hound" 

The rancher cried. 



"And furthermore, this land" quoth he. 
From East to West is God's Country 
The garden spot of earth is she 

Long live Our Land" 
And waved his hat in highest glee. 

— A patriot grand. 



But now the Conference had adjourned 
We toward our homes our faces turne'l 
Some prap's with indignation burned 

Or felt distressed 
Some got than better they had earned 

Though filled with zest. 



And Other Poems 25 

I now was on my charge again 

Forgotten all my recent pain, 

Though moved by Conference it was plain. 

I'd better stay. 
Therefore I longer did remain 

On larger pay. 



Then Winter came — So quick time goes — 
And keen the cold north-easter blows 
Biting your ears and cheeks and nose 

Your lips and chin. 
And boldly gnawing at your toes 

Until ycu grin. 



On duty bcund one winter night 

The cold w.nds blew. The snow fell whit; 

I drove six miles and tied all right. 

Son.e dirty crook 
My blanket p'nned and buckled tight 

Off my horse took. 



Of coui'se my blanket was a loss 
For it was new. But I was cross 
To see that poor old faithful 'boss 

Cold shaking stand. 
Because such dirty meanness was 

Abruptly planned. 

But evil oft is turned to good 

By Providence. Though like a flood 

The devil comes. John said he could 

Resisted be 
And beaten straightv/ay dog-like would 

Turn tail and flee. 



26 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Christmas was near. At which you see 
In every church a Christmas-tree 
Where Santa fills our hearts with glee 

Both young and old. 
A lovely robe he handed me 

To fight the cold. 



Another m?.n of worth and years 

Had long- lived there, And oft with tears 

The people warned. He had grave fears 

Of sin, its shame. 
That n an so much like ancient seers 

Fared just the same. 



Their value: Ten times what I gave 
For all that soulless brainless knave 
Took that cold night. Oh wretched slave 

To shameful sin. 
Seek mercy ere the cold dark grave 

Your slipping in. 



Seek mercy now. Seek it in fear 

Live square with men. Keep conscience clear 

With Retribution, oft severe 

We must contend. 
The honest ivan most everywhere 

Wins in the end. 



And should these verses reach the eye 
Of any thief, Make your reply 
By saying: 'Henceforth I will try 

As best I can 
By God's good grace to pass things by 

And be a man'. 



And Other Poems 27 



Then if your conscience will not cease 
To give you pain which doth increase 
As days go by. It will release 

You right away 
If you will in your search for peace 

Confess and pay. 



And in the future will take heed 

Less to a dogma or a creed 

Than to your ways. Tis they that lead 

To weal of woe. 
The soul when from the body freed 

It's woes may know. 



The winter months have not seemed long 
Each day has brought some cause for song 
Though homesick days have been among 

The rest of life. 
A lonely man will do no wrong 

To take a wife. 



Our Lecture Course was well worth while 
The talent dressed in latest style 
The evening hours would oft beguile 

With music sweet. 
A negro chorus by a mile 

All others beat 



Spring now has come. Thrice welcome Spring- 
Once more the birds are on the wing 
Once more their cheerful notes they sing 

Their new homes build. 
And Niture back to life dothspring 

With beauty filled. 



23 Experiences cf a Greanliorn 

But when Spring came we had to stare 

Right in the face a sir.allpox scare. 

The schools closed down and did declare 

Two weaks of rest. 
The churches did not meet for prayer, 

They thought it best. 



Th's does not seem a dread disease 
To us out here. But if you please 
Tis deadly scourge "Across the Seas" 

There people die. 
Its ravages the gods appease 

I know not why. 



If more of this you fain would know 
How it fills human hearts with woe 
How oft it deals a deadly blow 

To man or wife. 
Buy, read, and you will wiser grow. 

"Gipsy Smith's Life" 



Well knowing this I thought to hide 
My face at home. On every side 
Were yellow cards both large and wide. 

The truth to tell 
At heme I closely did abide, 

And so kept well. 



The doctor worked both day and night. 
Announced its form was very light 
And shut them in on left and right 

And vaccinated. 
And bravely won the fight. 

It soon abated. 



And Other Poems 29 

To tell of all that I have seen. 

Whom I have met. Where I have been, 

Things taking: place 'behind the scene' 

By base boot-leggars. 
Of progress made by patriots clean 

Description beggars. 



Ai::l thuo has passed my 'geenhorn' year. 
Oft lonesome true. But kind friends here 
Have made me welcome everywhere 

Excepted none. 
Their sympathies the heart would cheer 

If made of stone. 



And now kind reader ere we part 
Let's talk together, heart to heart. 
Give me your fist old chap, and start 

This very day 
To serve the Christ, who doth impart 

Peace peace alway. 



Tis true that Jesus lives and saves, 
Tis true as rolls the ocean waves, 
Your soul this richer blessings craves 

For mercy longs 
He saveth all from seers to knaves 

And fills with songs. 

Why need you longer from Him stay? 
Why wander. Oh! so far away 
Why wait until your hair is grey 

And then begin. 
When years and years have passed away 

In wrong and sin. 



30 E::reriences of a Greenhorn 

No other friend would you treat so 
But with them willingly would go. 
Christ is your Friend come weal or woe 

A Friend indeed, 
A Savior-Friend as all may know 

What'er their creed. 



Sin is not worth the price you pay. 
Not though the world may seem so gay 
"I've played the fool" You'll cry some day. 

— Hear mercy's call 
And cry away, away, away, 

My sins and all. 



The present life will sweeter be 
The future hold less mystery 
Death looming up by stern decree 

Will mean less too. 
Pax vobiscum — Peace be with thee 

Adieu, Adieu. 



And Other Poems 31 



THE OLD MILL BY THE DAM 

All silently upon the hill 

There stands the old forsaken mill 

The river runneth slowly by 

And every ripple seems to sigh 

Once more the old mill wheel to turn. 

To laugh and leap, to foam and churn. 

Her wheels are still. No more they spin 

With noisy clatter, merry din. 

The dusty miller too is gone 

The old mill standeth all alone 

Save when the sparrow builds its nest 

Or lonely pigeon stops to rest. 



Her windows all are gaping wide 
Her doors unhinged and torn her side, 
The poor old mill is wounded sore 
And seems to say "I'll run no more, 
My days of usefulness are gone 
And I am broken and undone." 



No more doth come the sprightly steed 
With corn or grain to grind for feed. 
The winding lane is all grown green 
And strangely peaceful is the scene. 
The rodents too have gone away 
For lack of food they could not stay. 



32 Experiences cf a Greenhorn 



The lordly dam well-built and strong- 
Which did good work and stood there long. 
Where fisherman with hook and bait 
For carp or catfish long would wait 
All ruined lies and most washed out 
With desolation strewed about. 



The ice-man used to come and go 
And haul big ice-cakes through the snow, 
He too has left the scenes of yore 
And winter bringeth him no more. 
The old boat-house is rotting down 
And tall weeds everywhere have grown. 



And thus the poor old mill doth stand 
Yet eloquent she speaks and grand: 
Our fleeting hours are passing by 
As she is now so you and I 
Will one day be; Our work-time gone 
And like her broken and undone. 



If we of life would make the best 

We must ^eap to our task with zest 

For life is but a span or so 

And we'll grow old before we know, 

Like that, old mill. — Our work — time past. 

"As is the first so is the last". 



And Other Poems ZS 



THE RUINED DAM 

O Dam: Thou idol of us all 

Who near thee dwell or in thy town 

Thou seemed so strong, defiant, proud 

We loved thy smile, we feared thy frown. 

The silvery waters o'er thee leapt 

And sweetly sang in deep bass tones 

But now thy song has died away 

Thy strength has turned to bleaching bones 

O Dam! Dam! 



O Dam: Thou speakest to us yet 

We hear a v/hisper from thy tomb 

It tells of men once strong and proud 

It tells of their impending doom. 

Exalted monarchs swept away 

Before an angry human tide 

The waters rose, the ice banks formed 

Down stream went kingly strength and pride, 

O Dam! Dam! 



O Dam: We mourn thy cruel fate 
For thou art now of yesterday 
Old Father Time has swung his blade 
And snatched thee from the world away 
And so it is with both of us 
We're governed by the same decree 
Save you will never be again 
And I; Yes I shall always be. 

O Dam! Dam! 



34 Experiences of a Greenhorn 



A RAINY SUNDAY AFTERNOON 

The raindrops fall ten million strong- 
All re-inforced by millions more. 
The earth has washed his muddy face 
And drank his fill through eVv^ry pore. 
Has scrubbed his hands and batliod his feet 
A long shower-bath he plans to-night. 
To-morrow he will dry his skin 
With gentle winds and warm sunlight, 



The sun today hides well his face 

Behind a dark and threatening :^ky. 

My feelings too are slightly sad 

As sparrows chirp and south-winds sigh 

Y^es; it is Sunday afternoon 

And I am in the mood to write. 

As slowly pass the hours away 

And nearer draw the shades of night. 



Tcday a friend sails o'er the sea 

— A Welshman going back to Wales. 

To visit loved ones in that land 

The place from which he fondly hails. 

But one dear friend he will not meet 

— Besides her new-made grave will stand 

For God has sent His Angels down 

And she is in the Better Land. 



And Other Poems 

I seem to sail with him today, 

Our mingled feelings strangely stirred. 

On every side the white-caps foam 

Though seem through visions somewhat blurred. 

I too have those I left one day, 

We fondly kissed and said *good-by'. 

Today in quiet peace they sleep 

Within the earth. Beneath the sky. 



Next childhoods days come back to me. 
Those golden hours I used to know. 
The entrance to lifes w^inding ways 
Unfolding as we older grow. 
How changed the scenes. How rough the path- 
Though some still live, with children blest. 
But Oh! How many sleep today. 
In quiet scattered graves they rest. 



And thus I seem to see once more 
The place made sacred by such ties. 
And nestle snugly up to God 
Beside the spot where father lies. 
And mother sleeps in quiet peace. 
Not they They live where angels sing. 
With bowed bent head I yield afresh 
Myself; My all to Christ my King, 



36 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

"THE HOUSE BESIDE THE ROAD"— A EULOGY 

Written after reading Sam Walter Foss's poem bear- 
ing the above title. The author knows nothing of 
The man about whom he writes save only as he has 
summed up the man from his very delightful and 
most popular poem. 

Let me sing of the man who sang that song, 

Let me sing of him evermore. 

His heart seems right. In his soul is light. 

His mind is a treasure store. 

His words are sweeter than lovers charms 

There is music in every note. 

He eclipses the jubilant mocking bird 

With a thousand songs in his throat. 

Let me write of the man that wrote those lines 

Let me write of him often and long. 

For he is a human of elegant grace 

And his life seems one grand sweet song. 

His ego is sending forth visions of light 

Like a fountain of luminous stars. 

He refreshes the weary; The thirsty he slakes. 

He seems as magnetic as Mars. 



Let me dwell witii the man who dwells among men 

Who knows how to sing and to sigh. 

Who is just a plain human without any airs 

Though his station in life may be high. 

No; I am not gone on the highbrows who think 

They are made of superior clay. 

But I love the poet who is just a plain man 

And whose greatness is seen in his lay. 



And Other Poems M 



Let me love with the man who loves his own race 

Who scatters good-will and not strife. 

Per who loves his fellow doth also love God 

Since Love is the Fountain of Life. 

It fulfills the command which He gave unto men 

Who taught in dispised Galilee, 

And said to the wayward the weary the worn 

■'I.:: r/.l who will come unto Me". 



THE HAPPY DAY 

Hail; happy day. The very best of all the days 

That I have lived to see or e'er will see. 

For though adjustments new my ways disturb 

I now have got a mate to dwell with we 

In my snug nest. No longer now I walk alone 

But we together travel down the years 

And live and love and weep each others tears 

We are not units now. We two are one. 



Hail Happy day. The bride endowed with fondest 

hopes 
Though all the future to her is unknown 
To day she trusts, yes, trust without a doubt 
For God hath said: "Not good to be alone" 
And as the bird betrothed unto its mate doth ( ome 
So Cometh she, herself, herself complete 
She gives, with tears and smiles so sweet 
Gives unto him. Her idol and her home- 



38 E::i:e:-iences of a Greenhorn 

Hail: Happy day. The bridegroom justly proud 

of her 
Who is, today,, his sweetheart and his bride. 
Lifes rugged path will now much rmoother be 
Since she, his day-star will be by his side 
The summer suns may shine or blow cold winters 

blast 
His heart is brave. He hath a help mate true 
A complete soul, like which in Eden grew 
And will be his so long as life shall last. 



Hail: Happy day. Together we join hands. 
Henceforth to face the world as man and wife 
And justly share the burdens and the joys 
So common to the pilgrims of this life. 
Our Pattern and our Guide the Christ shall ever be 
There is none else who knows and understands 
Our faltering feet, our wayward hearts and hands 
There is but one. — The Man of Galilee. 



Hail: Happy day. It seems we hear the Golden 

Bells 
And with those Bells we hear the angels sing. 
True love is now enthroned upon the earth 
The love of man and love of Heavens King. 
Another Wedding Feast the Future is to see 
T'will be the Marriage Supper of the Lamb 
The faithful Christian and the Great I Am. 
That Wedding is for all Eternity 



And Other Poems •^■> 

CONGRATULATIONS. 



I wish to take a little time 
To tell to you my friends in rhyme 
The many things I wish for ycu 
I wish my wishes may come true 
I wish you both in new velaticnc 
Accept my warm congratuhi lions 



Much happiness I wish for you 

With sweetest joys attached thereto, 

And added rich and robust health 

Plus not too-much, but yet some wealth. 

I wish you friends. Yes more and more 

Friends of the kind we all adore. 

I wish ycu each to each be true 

— A love thats old but ever new. 

I wish you free from every pain, 

— As you are now may you remain. 

I wish appendicitis may 

By you be ever kept at bay, 

Tuberculosis gaunt-like form 

Ncr you nor yours may never harm. 

No rheumatism in your bones 

Until you seek relief in groans 

I wish the air around ycu free 

From germs or dangerous bacilli 

That no disease on you will prey 

But keep ten thousand miles away. 

I wish you not one trying hour 

— The kind that makes our tempers sour. 

No days when everything goes wrong 

And ceems to take from life the song. 

I wish the flowers may smile on you 

For God has pleased to make them so. 

I wish for you the birds may sing 

The sweetest carols they can bring. 



40 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

The trees stretch out their long green arnis 
To shield you mid the stornxs alarms 
I wish the hills tell you of God 
—The hills that Christ feet often trod 
I wish the seas moan in your ears 
Lest ye forget a world of tears. 
The skies above you ever blue 
— Gods arch of grand ethereal hue 
I wish the stars their silvery light 
May scatter 'long your path each night, 
I wish the moon — The Travelers friend 
To you its borrowed rays may lend 
And may 'Old Sol' with kindly glare 
Direct towards you his gentle stare. 
I wish that heaven and earth combine 
To crown your lives with light Divine, 
I wish right here to change my strain 
And come right down to earth again, 
I wish you neat and well-kept house 
May never know one little mouse. 
Your beds of clean and spotless white 
The noblest souls may rest at night. 
Each welcome well-met well-fed guest 
May rank among earths very best 
I wish you never fell downstairs 
Necessitating quick repairs 
I wish each night in peace you sleep 
While guardian angels near you keeo. 
Your dreams the kind that Jacob dreamed 
A ladder reaching Heaven it seemed 
With myriad angels bright and fair 
Ascending and descending there. 
May only good come neath your roof 
And only bad stay far aloof. 
I wish you music of the best 
Pianos, Trombones and the rest 
And may your fingers deftly fly 



And Other Poems 41 

Along their notes both low and high 

Until the air is all replete 

With music rich and soft and sweet. 

I wish you sing with well-trained voice 

The songs your heart has made its choice 

Producing music from the soul 

Like harps sweet note or snare-drums roll. 

I wish you books. A goodly store 

Of Dickins, Scott and many more. 

The works of poets great and small 

Shakespeare and Homer Burns and all. 

The work of scientists of note 

Philosophies the best afloat, 

Good histories of every race 

Whose works have won for them a placo. 

I wish you humorous works — A chain 

From Chaucer down to Good Mark Twain. 

I wish ycu love more than your gold 

The story ever new though old 

*'The Book of God", "The Word of Light'* 

"The Chart of Heaven", "The Sword of Might". 

The Book that guides our wandering feet 

And makes our trust in God complete. 

I wish among my many wishes 

Your pantry filled with costly dishes 

And with it all a varied mass 

Of all thats best among cut-glass. 

I wish your larder filled with steak 

With pork and cheese and pies and cake. 

Three times each day your table spread 

With choicest foods. 'Our daily bread' 

A cup of black-tea steeping hot 

With more tea steeping in the pot, 

And when your tastes still craving seem 

A piled up dish of good ice-cream. 

I wish all these things may be yours 

And all things else your heart implores. 



42 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

I wish your home may never burn 
From causes you will never learn 
Nor from a flue cr faulty wires 
— These two have caused a host of fires. 
I wish no burglar, beggar, thief 
Call at your home and cause you grief. 
May all such like pass by your door 
'•Poor devils" or "The devils poor" 
I wish the lightnings lurid light 
Strike not your home with all its might 
No meteor dropping from the skies 
Drop where your ship at anchor liej. 
No angry cyclones hit your town 
To tear things up and smash things down. 
No floods come seething through your street 
No hail storms on your windows beat 
Na land-slides tumbling plungi iieud long- 
Where you or ought you own belong. 
I wish the earth may never quake 
You and your home a victim mako. 
No air-ship passing o'er your head 
Crash down on you when you're in bed 
No pestilences in the air 
No war with all its death and glars. 
(God send the day when war.^ shall cease 
I pray you work and pray for peace) 
I wish you horses kind and good 
And carriages of cedar-wood. 
The kind that will not run away 
But always word and lein obey. 
I wish you driving fast and far. 
The latest style of 'motor-car' 
And in an air-plane oft to r'de 
So high the clouds the earth will hide 
I wish you in a big balloon, 
Go sweetly sailing toward the moon. 
And on the finest, fastest train 



And Other Poems 43 

To ride or valley hill and plain. 

A lovely yacht to sail the seas 

To take a trip just when you please. 

A submarine I wish you'd keep 

And know the wonders of the deep. 

From accidents I would ycu Lpr.ro 

On land, on sea, or in the air. 

I wish you mansion, parks and deer 

With orchards, gardens, pens for bear. 

May you own factories, fields and farms 

And woods and lakes with all their charms 

With lots of time to fish and hunt 

The game just crowding round your punt. 

A well-kept watch-dog bold and brave 

To guard your tent and be your slave. 

I wish you lovely silken gowns 

The very best the country owns. 

Huge diamonds, pins and rings of gold 

And jewels rare: Of worth untold 

All things I wish I cannot name 

But may they reach you all the same. 

And since it is the truth that wins 

I wish for you one pair of twins. 

For one night may you walk the floor. 

Just one whole night. Not any more. 

I wish their faces full of smiles 

Their laughter heard for many miles 

I wish their tongues go like small clocks 

I wish them auburn hair in locks. 

I wish their eyes a pretty blue 

I wish their cheeks all rosy too. 

I wish their tiny little feet 

Go pitter-patter on the street. 

I wish they climb upon your knees 

To pull your hair to hug and squeeze. 

I v/ish they say "Tiss me mamma" 

And then likewise "Me lubs papa". 



44 Experiences cf a Greenhorn 

I wish they seem like jewels rare 

Given of God your love to share 

I wish all mad-dogs far away 

From where these sweet-heart children play. 

I v/ish then thousand blessings come 

Ar.d twice ten thousand to your home. 

And now I wish to say ''Adieu'^ 

My parting words "God be with you". 

And though the mighty sea us parts 

I crave a wee place in your hearts. 

I wish when bowed your knees in prayer 

You one petition for me spa.re. 

And when to Heaven I lift mine eyes 

To pray for you I'll not despise. 

Old friends, old scenes thus hallowed seem, 

So think of me. Of you I'll dream. 

I wish you life for many years 

With them no cause for bitter tears. 

Each year just like a bird flits by, 

May you stay young. May you aim high, 

May Death call on you very late, 

Your age may it be counted 'great'. 

Your graves ere be the fairest spot 

On some green hill. Some well-kept lot. 

And in the City of the Dead 

A big mausoleum house your bed. 

Well guarded by six tall pine trees 

Fanned daily by a gentle breeze. 

May sweetest carols scent the air 

The thrush and robin carol there. 

And may the place be hallowed ground 

The place where your remains are found. 

And strangers passing by your bed 

May silent stand or softly tread. 

When your souls reach the Pearly Gate 

For you may good Saint Peter wait 

And in the Name of Christ declare 



And Other Poems 4r» 



That you are more than welcome there, 
For on God's Records are made known 
The faith and works which were your own. 
Your faith in Heaven. Your trust in God. 
Belief in Christs all-Cleansing Blood. 
Your acts of love. You work of grace 
Your kindness to the human race. 
Your prayers and labors for the soul 
You thought in Christ could be made whole. 
Your noble lives. Your gentle mien 
Your symapthies so fresh and keen, 
Your words so full of hope and cheer 
And other things are written there. 
Then Heaven's Gate is opened wide 
Respectfully you step inside 
And walk along its ways of gold 
Whose glories never can be told. 
What there awaits the saved and blest 
Cannot be known until we rest 
Beneath the folds of some shade tree. 
The life well-spent. The soul set free. 
You reach the Great White Throne of God, 
None but good souls, that path hath trod 
Arrayed in robes of purest white 
With myriad souls, — A glorious sight — 
You join them while they sing th?.t song 
Known only to that blood-washed throng. 
The scene here ends. The curtain drops. 
Right here my quiet musings stops. 



I wish my faults you will excuse 
For I am but a budding muse 
And will perhaps some future day 
Have something more worthwhile to say. 
And this is my apology 
I study most theology. 



46 E'-pcriencGS of a Greenhorn 



SOLDIER^ OF DEMOCRACY 

The boys have gone! Yes, our boys, 
The boys we loved and schooled and raised, 
And prayed for — If we pray at all — 
Its left us sort of half-way dazed. 
The boys who played their boyish pranks 
Mixed fun with work each working day, 
Made life one happy cheerful round, 
These boys — Our boys — have gone away. 
But they'll come back some better day 
— At least all who survive the fray — 
With smiles and yells and many a shout 
They'll wave their campaign hats about. 
Today they stalk the 'beastly Hun* 
With rifle and quick-firing gun. 
They fight for you. They fight for me 
The Soldiers of Democracy 



The boys have gone! Yes, our boys. 
The olive drab today they wear. 
We saw them off: We waved *good-by* 
Old Glory flew o'er many a tear. 
But they were brave and so were we 
For firm resolve crowned feelings bad. 
We pledged ourselves to see this through 
Not one would fail that soldier lad. 

But we shall see again some day 

— No, not the boys who went away — 

They will be changed. They will be men! 

One year will age them more than ten. 

If I make bold the truth to tell 

They will have passed through worse than hell. 

Through dangers thick on land and sea 

As Soldiers of Democracy. 



And Other Poems 47 

The boys have gone! Yes, our boys, 

Our flesh and blood. Our kith and kin. 

Four millions march to meet the foe 

Erch man resolved to die or win. 

"The Old Flag never touched the Ground" 

By God's Good grace she still floats high. 

Thats M^hy our boys have gone away 

Thats why today we said 'good-by' 
They will return some better day 
— Though some, alas! in France will stay. 
In soldier terms will have "Gone West" 
'Beneath the daisies' ever rest. — 
They will have got the Potsdam Gang 
Despite that hell-born serpents fang. 
Our love, our prayers, shall follow thee 
Proud Soldier of Democracy. 



BOYS IN BLUE 

I met one day a boy in blue 

A' standing by the highway 

With head erect and eyes that shone 

Like stars in the blue sky-way. 

I said "Hello! Where are you from?" 

He answered. "From the West, Sir" 

Then vanished for he drove away. 

I s'pose he thought it best, Sir. 

Though gone; In thought I followed him 

And rode the stormy billow. 

I felt my heart a'warming to'ard 

That brave and hearty fellow. 

Hats off to you 

Brave boy in blue 



ExperieHCeg of a Greenhorn 



We love you. Yes, we love you. 

And often pray 

The live-long day 

To Hiin who dwells above you. 

Still on you go 

Though strong winds blow, 

Nor heed the stormy billow 

Hats off to you 

Brave boys in Blue, 

My hale, my hearty fellow. 



On board a steamer small one day 
I sailed around some gun-boats. 
Tis true that they were Allies all, 
For none of them were Hun boats. 
I saw the helmsman near the helm, 
The gunner on the starboard 
The seaman washing off the decks 
The "Middle" to the larboard. 
Emotions strange crept o'er my soul, 
My heart leaped to'ard those fellows. 
For day and night safe watch they kept 
Upon the stormy billows. 

Hats off to you 

Brave boy in blue 

We love you. Yes, we love you. 

And often pray 

The live-long day 

To Him who dwells above you. 

Still on you go 

Though strong winds blow, 

Nor heed the stormy billows 

Hats off to you 

Brave boys in Blue, 

My hale and hearty fellows. 



And Other Poems 49 

I saw one night a clear bright light 

A' shining 'cross a sea-lane. 

I knew a fighting ship lay there 

Or else a giant sea-plane. 

I knew each boy was at his post. 

That each would do the bidding 

Of duties call. Yes each and all, 

'Bout that there is no kidding. 

Upon that spot I fixed my gaze. 

Then prayed: "God bless those fellows.'* 

I knew that they were heroes all 

And rode the stormy billows. 

Hats off to you 

Brave boy in blue 

We love you. Yes, we love you. 

And often pray 

The live-long day 

To Him who dwells above you. 

Still on you go 

Though strong winds blow, 

Nor heed the stormy billows 

Hats off to you 

Brave boys in Blue, 

My hale and hearty fellows. 

I saw one day a ship of grey 

To port come slowly steaming. 

Her visage marred and battle-scarred. 

For war is more than seeming. 

Her crew. Some lamed; some badly maimed 

In battles wild commotion 

And in the strife some gave their life 

And sank beneath the ocean^ 

O Christ of love in Heaven above 

Who stilled the angry billows 

Be with each crew of boys in blue 

Protect and Save these fellows. 



50 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Hats off to ycu 

Brave boy in blue 

We love you. Yes, we love you. 

And often pray 

The live-long day 

To Him who dwells above you. 

Still on you go 

Though strong winds blow, 

Nor heed the stormy billows 

Hats off to you 

Brave boys in Blue, 

My hale and hearty fellows. 



MY INDULGENCE 

Some folks like good buttermilk 

Some folks like root-beer 

Seme folks like to 'preciate 

Some folks like to sneer. 

Some folks like to work all day 

Some folks like to loaf 

Some folks like to do big things 

Some folks like to bluff 

For all of these I do not crave 

One thing is dear to me: 

Just pass the sugar and the cream 

And a cup of good black tea. 

Give me one cup 

Give me two cups 

Yes give me three or four. 

And if the teapot still holds out 

I'll take a couple more. 



And Othjr Pczlv.g 51 



Give me seven cups 

Give me eight cups 

Yes, make it nine and ten. 

And if you still are friend o'mine 

I'll take another then. 



Some folks like to play baseball. 

Some folks like to root. 

Some folks like to play at golf 

Some folks like to shoot 

Some folks like to ride a horse 

Some folks like to walk. 

Some folks like to play the flute 

Some folks like to talk 

These things may be good and clean 

They don't appeal to me 

Without the sugar and the cream 

And a cup of good black tea 

Give me one cup 

Give me two cups 

Yes give me three or four. 

And if the teapot still holds out 

I'll take a couple more. 

Give me seven cups 

Give me eight cups 

Yes, make it nine and ten. 

And if you still are friend o'mine 

I'll take another then. 



Some folks like good apple-pie 
Some folks angel cake. 
Some folks like good oyster stew 
Some folks like beef steak. 
Scnic fo''ks long for sauerkraut 
Some folks crave for ham. 
Some folks love a weine roast 



Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Some folks like plum jam. 
And none of these would I despise 
But they seem poor to me 
Without the sugar and the cream 
And a cup of good black tea. 

Give me one cup 

Give me two cups 

Yes give me three or four. 

And if the teapot still holds out 

I'll take a couple more. 

Give me seven cups 

Give me eight cups 

Yes, make it nine and ten. 

And if you still are friend o'mine 

I'll take another then. 

Some folks like to mix with folks 

Some folks live alone 

Some folks take the marriage vow 

Some are never won. 

Some folks like to have their way 

Some folks do not care. 

Some folks like to boss the job 

Some folks would not dare. 

'Bout such as these I've nought to say 

One thing looks good to me. 

Just pass the sugar and the cream 

And a cup of good black tea. 

Give me one cup 

Give me two cups 

Yes give me three or four. 

And if the teapot still holds out 

I'll take a couple more. 

Give me seven cups 

Give me eight cups 

Yes, make it nine and ten. 

And if you still are friend o'mine 



And Other Poems o^ 

I'll take another then. 

O you may cry "Extravagant" 
And sort of pious look 
Tea is not an intoxicant. 
Condemned in the Good Book. 
And I have gone without it 
For a whole year at a spell 
Eut juil; thG same I love it 
And the truth I aim to tell. 
Yes, I'm a friend of goodness 
And the church is dear to me. 
But I have got a weakness great 
For a cup of good black tea. 

Give n:c one cup 

Give me two cups 

Yes, give me three and four 

And if the teapot still holds out 

I'll take a couple more. 

Give me seven cups 

Give me eight cups 

Y"es, make it nine and ten. 

And if you are not ashamed of me 

I'll drink another then. 



^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 



SONNET ON IJFF 



And what is life? The victory of a soul 
O'er all the latent tendencies to sin. 
To cast out self; The Larger Self to win; 
The Self which is our aim and end and goal 

Of Life we read much in the Sacred Scroll 
It's source and secret are contained therein. 
With love of truth tis very much akin 
And all that Adam was when he was whole. 



54 Expe-'iences of a Greenhorn 

Would we know life; We must be true and brave 
And love all folks; and Him who life doth give. 
Not 'fraid of death; but 'fraid we may not live 
Like Him who came the whole wide world to save 



Though all the world with teachings long was rife 
Christ spake: "I am the Way, the Truth, the Life". 



SONNET ON DEATH 

What is this death ? The passing of a soul 
Into eternity. Where it doth dwell 
As spirit is not known. Nor can we tell 
Ought of its shape while on the ages roll. 



But when at last some friends for us shall toll 
The stately solemn muffled old church bell 
The pain which loved ones feel they seek to quell 
Believing we have safely reached the goal 



When we lie sleeping in our earthy bed 
Returned, as wisdom saith, "Dust unto dust" 
Will realize the hope which all men trust 
Will earn the secret known but to the dead 



Will understand that cry above earth's strife. 
"I am the Resurrection and the Life." 



And Other Poems 55 

SONNET ON WORSHIP 

(A Soliloqy) 

Why should I go to Church on Sunday twice, 

And take in sermons be they ere so good 

And pray, and sing old time worn hymns ? I would 

Piefer to spare myself such sacrifice. 



Who says I ought to go ? Is it not nice 
To spend the Sabbath as I please. I could 
Have pleasant times. Besides tis understood 
Heligion's had at much too high a price. 



But was a good thing ever had for nought? 

And things worth while are things that alw^ays cost. 

And if my character and soul are lost 

I have lost all no matter what I sought 



Since this is true to Church then I must go 

For there they teach the things I need to know. 



SONNET ON STN 

Sin lies in disobedience to God 
In will or deed. We wisely have been taught. 
Unholy acts of life Unhallowed thought. 
Forbidden fruits. The path by Adam trod. 



$6 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Sin is to walk with feet that are not shod 
With gospel preparation. To have wrought 
Along a road unlovely and unsought 
Except to those who seek God's chastening rod. 



Sin is to turn away from Highest Good 

The Father's House. His kindly yearning love. 

Not to believe, when all around, above 

Are signs of God's true tender Fatherhood. 



How long; How long Christ shall sin abound 
In human hearts ? In Thee sin was not found. 



THE BED-BUG AND THE BUG 

1 sought my room. I shut my door. The key I 

safely turned * 
For I travelled three days straight, a good nights 

rest had earned. 
My prayers were said while snow-white sheets did 

make a strong appeal 
With pillow soft and downy, all my tiredness to heal. 
I slept. I dreamed. I s'pose I snored and woke that 

bedbug up 
At any rate he sallied forth like Buster Brown's 

bull pup. 
He chewed my legs, he bit my back. That creature 

sucked my blood. 
An uninvited parasite who feasted long and good. 



And Other Poems 57 

I have known folks much like him in a way that 1 

will tell. 
Their nerve has chased their sense away; their heads 

an empty shell. 
They victimize their 'relatives' and 'friends' they 

treat likewise, 
Their visits are indefinite; they're governed by no 

ties. 
Propriety is nought to them they go just where they 

please, 
Convenient or otherwise they're perfectly at ease. 
Compared with such that lone bedbug who preyed 

on me that night. 
Was educated, cultured, well-refined and most polite. 



A RATTLESNAKE AND ANOTHER SNAKE 

1 wandered o'er the prairies near Dakota's bleak 

Black Hills 
And heard the distant music of her rivulets and rills 
Accompanied by voices weird that sang in mystic 

tones 
Of frontier life; the gallant charms to all but knaves 

and drones 
They sang the praise of heroes brave: The men of 

yesterday 
Who drove the Red skinned warriors back and settled 

there to stay. 
1 wildly shrieked! Ten feet I jumped! Perspired 

With fear did shake! 
Twas the warning and the gleaming eyes of an 

angry rattle-snake. 



58 Experiences cf a Greenhorn 

I wandered next mid different scenes: Society I 

sought 
Charmed by orchestral music and the sweetest vocal 

note. 
They moved in shining silken robes; wore sparkling 

diamond rings. 
That audience would most outshine the Courts of 

Europe's Kings. 
Arrested by a female voice I cau2"ht her gleaming- 
eyes, 
Her tongue v/as filled with venom and her words 

were filthy lies. 
Great God! I yelled! I jumped again! Which did 

confusion make. 
I loathe a gossip-monger as I loathe a rattle-snake. 



THE FORD CAR AND THE TRAIN 

Tv/as Sunday morn: The 'phone bell rang. A farmer 

on the line 
Called up his neighbor for a chat. The weather it 

was fine. 
"Come bring the folks along" he said, ''Lets spend 

the day together. 
You can't afford to stay at heme this glorious Spring 

weather." 
And so the 'little Ford' v/as cranked; the family got 

in. 
And Goon the neighbors heme v/as reached. Twas 

but a little spin. 
The children in the school-going togs played on 'til 

well past noon. 
Indoors two v^omen cooked the meal and laid each 

knife and spoon. 
"The men! The men! Where are those men?" They 

oft were heard to say. 
"We've waited now 'til three-fifteen, at ten they 



AnJ 0.:i - Po: n 59 

went away." 

They had to eat without them, for the meal time 
long was past. 

— They always eat without them, now when 'er they 
break their fast. 

Those two men and that 'littie Ford' had sought a 
place in point 

Th3 Ford drank nought but water v/hile they hit' a 
bootleg joint, 

Then started home. The booze they'd drank accele- 
rated speed. 

They did not see that train c.t all nor crossing-warn- 
ings heed. 

Twas over in a moirents space: A crash; A scream; 
A yell. 

The 'little Ford' was in the ditch. Those men in 
Heaven — cr Hell. 

I saw that br.dly smashed machine. The bottles and 
the brains 

A-strewed alon^; the railway track. -Don't pay to fool 
with trains. 



Somehow I feel a scene like that would turn a black 

man white, 
For booze had turned God's Day of Rest to darkest 

blackest night. 
God pity them. God pity us unless we strike him 

down 
—John Barleycorn alias Booze, of infamous renown. 



The funeral hour. The crowds flocked in their sym- 
pathies to show 

But all the same we laid them by mid scenes of deep- 
eci: woe. 

Gcd help us a'l lli: bcc.c to fight, your enemy and 

And beat the devil at his game and bust his *'Wacht 
am Rhein." 



6d Experiences of a Greenhorn 

THAT TELL-TALE SHOE 

I v/as out a-raising money for a Cause both great 

and grand. 
I called on people everywhere: — A canvass had been 

planned. 
I called on people eating and when working in the 

field. 
I even called on wash day: — Not good policy I yield. 
I called on ladies cleaning house or putting gardens 

in. 
I called on farmers planting corn or ready to begin. 
I called where there were eighteen folks. I called 

where there was one 
I called where they were 'going to town'. I called 

where they had gone. 
I called where they were cleaning grain or doing 

up the chores. 
I called on people on the street or trading in the 

stores. 
I called en men in barbers' chairs or buying gasoline 
I called on folks Vd met before and folks I'd never 

seen. 
I was calling, calling calling calling 'gain and yet 

again 
I'd take life on 'Treasure Isand' to another such 

campaign. 
I called 'til I was calling sick and almost calling mad 
I poiTnised God I would not fail. — God help me if I 

had. 



The scene is staged: A stylish home. A farmhouse 

near the road. 
The man reported well-to-do but carrying quite a load 
He's busy working in the field: His clothes well 

dashed with mud. 
His ears he straightway loans to me. My case I 



And Other Poems 61 

now make good. 
I get a sort of promise then return to take my car 

The distance from the field and house is never very 
far. 

The lady tall polite and kind bids me now step inside 

The family are all in there and visitors beside. 

With mus^c sweet she entertains since she has learn- 
ed to play 

And upright player-piano brought into her home that 
day. 

*-My Old Kentucky Home" is heard and then tis "Old 
Black Joe" 

Two old plantation melodies; both old yet ever new. 

That drawing room is spacious and its guests are 
courteous too 

But all is spoiled. — A trifling thing. A naughty tell- 
tale shoe. 

She's peddling hard: The music stops. I leave. 
Try not to see 

That shoeless foot. That heelless sock. That smil- 
ing company. 



There is a moral to my tale. That moral is applied. 
If we allow what we condemn, wrong will refuse to 

hide. 
Our faults will ventilate themselves when other folks 

are there 
And we shall be embarrased and perhaps act kind 

of queer. 
The lady mentioned in the case her foot held neath 

her dress 
I was polite and came away, the right thing too I 

guess. 
I tried to make believe that not a thing was out of 

place 
Apologized for going so soon and left with perfect 

grace. 



62 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

And yet a lesson I had learned and thus myself ad- 
dressed 
"My soul be what you seem to bo or you will go 

unblest, 
If you have faults and hide them rest assured they 

will be known, 
Not what you seem but what you are will bring its 

own renown." 
What then I said unto myself, I now would say to 

you: — 
We all must mend our stockings or the holes some 

day will show. 
While playing there her shoe fell off and showed that 

gaping hole 
Before God tis not what we seem but what is IN THE 

SOUL. 



AN ARDENT LOVER 

Long years ago I left her though I loved her through 
and through. 

She was beautiful yet treacherous. She was false 
yes grandly true. 

Oft while leaning on her bosom I have seen the tear- 
drops fall 

And her heart was wildly beating yet she smiled on 
through it all. 

Yes she loved me, kissed me, hugged me, claimed me 
as her very own 

While her breath was sweet with flowers and she 
wore a silken gown. 



And Other Poems 63 

Ten thousand times she pled with me, she wooed me 

night and day 
And her wooings were the strongest on the day I 

came away. 

I waved a fond farewell to her as from the port wo 

sailed 
From the shore she sweetly kissed me though her 

wooings now had failed. 
And i watched her 'til the distance wider and yet 

wider grew 
And my heart was aching sadly when she faded from 

my view 
I knew she blessed and prayed for me. I blessed 

and prayed for her 
And with emotions new and strange my heart was 

all astir. 
Just then my eyes turned mastward: Lo, her flag 

was floating there 
I stood erect; saluted; then walked briskly to my 

chair. 

She had children. A great many. Some poor; 

some had great wealth 
Some underfed and suff'ring others blessed with 

robust health. 
They had sapphires, rubies, diamonds and a crown 

of jewels rare 
Honors, titles, mansions, castles, gold in plenty and 

to spare. 
These exalted favored children oft their loyalty had 

proved 
But not more than other heroes who had died to prove 

their love. 
Her virtues, they were many and as many were her 

sins. 
Nor could I love her less for these. Hence here my 

tale begins. 



64 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Twould seem I am impervious to good designed for 

me. 
With heart like bold Gibralter's Rocks who scorn a 

moaning sea. 
Stern soldier-like and militant of sentiment undone 
A frozen unthawed iceberg that resists the summer 

sun. 
Oh false impression flee away. Ye do, ye do me 

wrong ? 
Tis not with rocks and icebergs and the like that I 

belong. 
I loved her: She who wooed me. Yes, her eloquence 

was grand. 
But I sought one younger, fairer, hence I left MY 

NATIVE LAND. 



^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 



THE NIGHT. 



The night is upon us; the day star has vanished; 
The Sun hides his blushes behind yonder hills. 
Man hurrieth homeward; birds nestle in stillness. 
Bright stars by the million heavens highway now fills 



The earth is in darkness; we sleep 'til the morning 
Shall bid us return to lifes tasks left undone. 
How welcome the darkness; thrice welcome the day- 
break, 
The glory, the challenge of day just begun 



And Other Poc;;.s 65 

The earth now is smiling: her tears she has banished 
— The dew-drops that fell from her cheeks in the 

night 
The flowers are bloonving; her busy bees humming, 
The trees of the field clap their hands with delight. 



So let us be happy since light follows darkness 
And smiles force their wsy through our oft falling 

tears. 
We traverse lifes highv/ays or grass covered by-ways 
Our Sun will 'go down' at the end of the years. 



_ THE BULLHEAD AND THE SHITEPOKE . 

One day I went a fishing with a hook and rod and line 

I did not have 'no luck at all' though some said 
'fishings fine' 

I used as bait a score of things from beefsteak down 
to bread 

And sat a full half day to catch one homely old bull- 
head. 

One day I went a hunting for big antelope or deer 

Though I confess such game as that might give me 
quite a scare 

I did not see 'no game at all* and hunting seemed a 
joke 

For the only bird that crossed my path was a long- 
necked o-d Ehitepoke. 

One day I went a preaching for the souls of men to 



66 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

save 

My mind was stored with Truth Divine and grace my 
heart did crave 

I thought to catch some men that day, some sinner's 
heart to win 

A short man and tall wife I found with mean con- 
temptuous grin. 

My fishing trip was not in vain because it pleasure 

gave 
The flowers and trees and rocks were there, the 

birds, the winds, the wave, 
They sang to me; they sang one song Love made 

them all and me 
My heart rejoiced, my soul seemed filled with eager 

childish glee. 
My hunting trip was well worth while, I walked full 

seven miles 
My cheeks were red when I returned and radiant 

with smiles 
My appetite was sharpened and I slept like Jacob 

when 
He dreamed a dream of angels though that night I 

dreamed of men. 
My preaching trip did some folks good, that follows 

as a rule 
But those afore I speak of were the big frogs of 

the pool. 
Frogs did I say? I take that back; apologize with 

speed 
Ke was a ' bullhead Anglophile, and she a 'shitepoke 

Swede'. 



And Other Poems 67 

WHEN THE KIDS START PLAYING MARBLES 
AND THE BIRDS BEGIN TO SING 

When the wintry winds are blowing and the snow 

in gentle flakes 
Lays her blanket warm and fleecy o'er the earth — 

her hills and lakes 
When the eaves are growing ch'n-beards formed from 

icicles that hang 
When we freeze in zero weather and tis winter with 

a bang. 
When the trees are hibernating or like skeletons 

stand mute 
When the song birds have gone southward and we 

miss their pipe and lute. 
Tis we sigh n^ath winters burdens and each day we 

long for Spring 
— When the kids start playing marbles and the birds 

begin to sing. 

When the winter days are over and the Spring-time 
has appeared 

When the coal-piles cease to lessen and the blizzards 
are not feared. 

When the farmer takes his tractor or perhaps his 
faithful mules 

And he plows his fields with ardor while his own best 
judgement rules. 

When the hogs are rooting up the soil and do not 
need the shade 

And the cackling hens announce ths egg deposits 
they have made. 

The balmy days are here again. — Tis Winter turn- 
ed to Spring.. 

For the k'As are playing marbles and the birds be- 
gin to sing. 



08 Experienees of a Greenhorn 

When summer days are here once more and it is 

scorching' h:t, 
We seek relief in cooling arts when such arts may 

be got. 
\«/hen the corn is growing taller by an inch or two 

each, day 
Vv'ith the tossles fast appearing 'long with stacks 

cf new-mcv/n hay. 
When the cat-fields have grown yellow and the 

harvest is at hand, 
And cur undulating ccuntry is a picture great and 

grand. 
It makes us think of Heaven's Plains: But what 

about the Spring 
— When the kids start playing marbles and the 

birds begin to sing. 



When Autumn days have rolled around and Nature 

bows her head 
The green has changed to amber-hues or sort of 

greenish red. 
The fiuit- trees laden down with fruit have thickly 

strewed the ground 
And everywhere abundant signs oi: 'tundance may 

be found. 
The shocks have turned to lone straw-piles, the 

stubble has been plov/ed 
"While the house-wife of her well canned fruits is 

sbrt of justly proud. 
The silos sides are bulging out: E'en then we wait 

for Spring 
— When the kids start playing marbles and the birds 

begin to sing. 



And thus it is the years flit by, the seasons come 
and go. 



And Other Poems 60 

And With them come the summers heat the winter'? 

frosts and snow, 
The milder days of Spring and Fall when all seems 

bright and gay 
— Oh! that the brighter days of life might longer 

with us stay. 
Each season brings its share of good; of good for 

you and me 
Yet Icng ago I made my choice: My choice shall 

ever be. 
The days when life springs back to life; the time 

we call the Spring 
— When the kids start playing marbles and the 

birds begin to sing. 



THE BULL DOG AND THE CHAIN 

It was Autumn. It was evening. I had stayed long 

with my books. 
Hence I strode around the village, sought its still 

sequestered nooks. 
The Hermit Thrust was singing from the tree top 

in the grove 
While the blue jay screeched his contrast to the 

silent mourning dove. 
The trees were robed in beauty green with many a 

colored tint 
And the western skies spread cnnvaso r:howed the 

artists glad imprint, 
I drank my fill of Natures Art to soothe my weary 

brain. 
When I saw a friendly bulldog tugging leaping at 

his chain. 



70 Ei.pe^'^cnccs of a Greenhorn 

I strolled along the beach one day and heard the 

wild waves sing 
Above them circled myriads of seabirds on the wing. 
The little pools the tide ha:l le^' v/ere everywhere 

about 
With scattered crowds of youngsters stepping bare- 
foot in and out. 
A fairy sweet with golden curls fast plied her little 

spade 
The sea she planned to empty in the trench which 

she had made. 
Her pail she filled a score of times, her efforts were 

in vain 
Like that playful friendly bulldog tugging leaping at 

his chain. 

I met a weary pilgrim who had strayed far from the 

West 
His mind was filled with fallacies his soul with eager 

lust 
He talked of 'revelations' Joseph Smith and Brigham 

Young 
And gave us all a lashing with an ill-directed tongue 
He mourned us all as ruined lost from old men down 

to youth 
And prayed us to enlightened be with *01d Jerusalem' 

Truth. 
His words fell harmless on our heads. The truth 

is more than plain. 
Just another playful bull dog tugging leaping at his 

chain 

And thus are taught lifes lessons as each day we 

journey on. 
The tragedy about it is how soon our tasks are done. 
We are mostly chasing bubbles through a thin 

elusive air 



And Other Poems 71 

Bursting ere our hands have grasped them leaving 

dark and deep dispair. 
A mystery ship we sail in largely on a phantom sea 
Often wondering and debating what the end is go- 
ing to be 
But this is good philosophy and I would say again 
Always leave a friendly bulldog tugging leaping at 
his chain. 



THE ACCIDENT OF BIRTH 

I 

Who has not heard in days of old 
There lived a warrior brave and bold 
Whose brothers mean one fateful day, 
Conspired against and drove away. 



The reason for this heartless deed 
— No Reuben here his cause to plead- 
Was simply this: — He came to earth 
Cursed by the accident of birth. 



His mother was a harlot vile 
Who lived perhaps in royal style, 
And when her child was born he had 
A lecherous monarch for his dad. 



Therefore his brothers drove him out, 
And taunted him with many a shout. 
His outraged soul cursed each and all, 
— He drank the bitter dregs of gall. 



72 EApeifiences of a Greenhorn 

Now in his veins ran kingly blood 
Combined with vilest motherhood. 
Straight to the land of Tob he fled, 
The bandits cave was now his bed. 



As chief of daring outlaw bands 

He lead his men to other lands. 

He pillaged, murdered: — Truth to tell 

Where Jephthah went twas just plain hell. 



He slew in long and bloody fights 
The fierce and warlike Ammonites. 
And then as war with Ephraim grew 
Full fifty thousand men he slew. 



When victory caused the war to cease 
For seven years he ruled in peace. 
The people loved him. Well they might 
— Could rule as good as he could fight. 



An honest soul will eulogize 
None but the great, the good, the wise. 
Will pity those who come to earth 
Cursed by the accident of birth. 



II 



A word about the Ammonites 
Whom Jephthah slew in hard-fought fights. 
They too were outlaws fierce and bold 
With crimes to numerous to be told. 



And Other Posmi 73 



But we must learn their origin 
Before we judge their heinous sin. 
Like Jephthah, Ammon came to earth 
Cursed by the accident of birth. 



In Sodom lived a man named Lot, 
Describe his sin: I'd rather not. 
Twas wine he drank. The rest is known. 
— They called him Ammon when he'd grown. 



Ill 



Nations and people still today 
Walk more or less the sinners way. 
And some there are who come to earth 
Cursed by the accident of birth. 



What shall we say of deeds of shame? 
Of vilest sins too foul to name? 
Of lost abandoned shameless lives ? 
Of libertines and faithless wives? 



What shall we say of dread disease 
With all its frightful ravages ? 
The brand of Cain on souls unborn, 
And Innocence held up to scorn 



What shall we say of lives 'laid down'? 
Careers of crime, their vile renown ? 
What of the hard of 'cruel fate'? 
What of the souls Eternal State? 



Experiences of a Greenhorn 

If others had lived straight and clean 

Then Jephthah's faults would not have been. 

If Lot had lived as all men should 

Then Ammon would have spilled no blood. 



If we would sometimes stop and weigh 
The thing we do, the thing we say. 
The world would know far less of pain 
And we would know far more of arain. 



We cannot all bequeath gi'eat wealth 
We can give vigor, life and health. 
Our children crown with truest worth 
Blest by the accident of birth. 



The Way of Life let us pursue 
Tis rich with blessings ever new. 
It negatives cur deepest woe. 
Brings lasting peace where 'er we go. 



MY WISHES 

I do not ask a hundred things then twice two hundred 

mere. 
Tis gold I want for gold is good and gold I would 

implore 
Wealth brings the care that buyeth health, a .niracle 

it works 
Then build our schools and colleges, our hospitals 



And Other Poems 75 

and kirks. 
Then I want knowledge of the best, the sciences and 

arts, 
Why God has made this world of ours and why 

these human hearts. 
Don't tell me knowledge pufFcth up, that shows a 

shallow mind. 
The more we know the less we know is wisdoms 

path you'll find. 
I want a lot of common sense, real horse sense; 

more and more. 
If I could choose like Solon an I'd own a sense cold- 
store. 
I'd have the mind of Socrates, the humor of Mark 

Twain. 
The good sound sense of "Honest Abe" again anJ 

yet again. 



Yes I w^ant gold with power to use that gold in doing 

good. 
I knowledge want for knowledge is a power well 

understood. 
And common sense the kind I seek is blessing rich 

and rare 
But God of Grace give me Thyself is my supremest 

prayer. 



SATIRE ON A LIAR 

I know net who has done this thing 
Nor where to fix the blame. 
I I:i:;t: ho ?hct wide of the mark 
And badly missed his aim. 



76 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

He wrote of me. I write of him, 
— A lesson for to teach 
That truth may lash his soot-black soul 
Like angry waves the beach. 



He dares to scratch my name beneath 
A challenge and a threat 
Someone has stolen someone's book. 
— An act we all regret. 



He thus suggests I have that book 
— He is a healthy liar. 
A moral burglar shoots at me 
And I return his fire. 



To use mild terms on such young braves. 

Is but to waste your time. 

A spades a spade. A fools a fool 

A madmans crime's a crime. 



No principle dwells in his soul 

No conscience and no scruple. 

There's just one place where that boob shines 

— The Devil's high-grade pupil. 

And should he die in that said state 

He's apt to dwell for ever 

Where wild-eyed demons scamp and scream 

And mercy comes; No never. 

Someone has stolen someone's book 
Thereby caused someone grief. 
Go find this shameless liar 
And you've got the dirty thief. 



And Other Poems 77 

IN HOSPITAL 

Kind friend who comest here to stay 

Be not o'er burdened with thy grief. 

Good souls dwell here who with great skill 

Will seek to give thy pain relief. 

Strange thoughts are thine and stranger moods 

While gloomy feelings with thee stay, 

Alternate hopes and lears combine 

With longings for a brighter day. 

Bid fear depart for God is here 

He listens to your every prayer. 1 



But thou hast friends who grieve today, 

— Be glad for these. God gave them thee. 

They watch beside thy pain-tossed bed 

With cheerful tender sympathy. 

And should the worst here come to thee 

The worst is better than the best 

Since death is but the gateway to 

The Realms of Everlasting Rest. 

Be not dismayed. Trust thou in God 

And in the Saviors Cleansing Blood. 



But thou desirest to get well 

In search of health thou camest here. 

Tie health that others seek for thee 

By skill applied with words that cheer. 

One half of one per cent or less 

Die frcm the troubles that are thine. 

How then can hope give wpy to fear? 

No need to quietly repine. 

Hope thou in Gcd. Thou vv^ilt be blest 

And calmly leave to Him the rest. 



78 E„;,c:Ic::cc3 cf a Greenhorn 

Kind friend who comest here to stay 
God grant thee peace ere thou depart. 
Gcd grant thee grace when thou art gone, 
God send His Love within thy he_. ': 
Hast thou lived well in other years 
Rich blessings be upon thy head. 
Hast thou lived far away from God 
Turn ere the western skies grow red. 
And thus dear friend thou shalt be whole 
Thy body healed and cleansed thy soul. 



THE IMMORALITY OF THE SOUL 
AN ARGUMENT 

No theological question has caused the writer so 
much serious thought as the above question. For 
years he has investigated along every line 
of thought open to him sometimes amid doubts and 
fears always hoping often sincerely praying to God 
that the truth might be known regardless of conse- 
quences. After a most impartial and honest investi- 
gaion he has been compelled to come to the conclu- 
sion that the human soul is immortal. As Browne 
says "Though demonstrated in nothing it is implied 
in everything. 



And is my soul immortal 

And shall I live again, 

Somewhere where perfect life is known 

Where come nor tears nor pain 



And Other Poems 

Where shineth neither moon nor stars 
Nor ever cometh night: 
Where Christ doth all illuminate 
With calm and heavenly light. 



tell me if I yet may hope 
Of such a world to know 

When thus has run my earthly course 

My ''Pilgrimage below?" 

It seems so good. Can it be true ? 

1 long, I yearn, I wait 

This thing to know.Then by God's grace 
I will investigate. 



But just a moment I must pause 

'Till freed from prejudice. 

The path is holy I must tread 

And I may walk amiss. 

Dear God; who made all things and me 

To Thee I come in prayer. 

Forgive my sins, remove my doubts 

My soul for Truth prepare. 



And thus the Good Book oft I take 
And there my lone heart finds 
Real comfort as it comes to feel 
Those great and noble minds 
Inspired were of God, who knows 
What is and is to be. 
They wrote as minds to whom revealed 
Our final destiny. 



80 E:.; crici.ccG cf a Greenhorn 

So unto faith I have appealed 

And some assurance found. 

But reason she asserts herself 

And asks; If on th:it gi.cu.nd 

I have a right thus to conclude 

For evermore I live. 

She asks to here join hands with Faith 

And help the verdict give. 



Together they will do their part 

Will frame a grand reply 

To those who doubt a future life 

And say "Tis nought to die" 

Tis universal this belief 

In life for evermore. 

Tis found in pre-historic man 

Tis found the whole world o'er. 



The primitive unscienced man 

Believed he'd live again 

His soul when from his body gone 

Close by would long remain. 

He crudely worshipped creature things 

Nor reptiles would he harm 

He said this were his ancestry 

Assumed another form. 



The dark Egyptian was embalmed 

To make his soul a home 

And well cooked meals in tombs were served 

Lest hungry he should roam. 

What of the Greeks ? Who does not know 

The martyr Socrates 

Preached life immortal; hence was slain 

By wicked men's decrees. 



And Other Poems 81 



The Savages: E'en they have faith 

To see another life 

For when a chief or near-chief dies 

Forthwith they kill his wife. 

Her soul it must acccmpany his 

Into the Spirit-World 

Since he will surely need her where 

Stern death his soul has hurled. 



Then Buddha taught successive life 
Until the soul doth win 
Sufficient merits to outweigh 
Demerits caused by sin. 
Nirvana is at last attained 
In which we dwell for aye 
Despite the fact it lies beyond 
A long and slippery way. 

Mohamet and Confucious 
Hold as their crowning hope 
The Life Beyond; if with success 
'Gainst evil here we cope. 
And Patriarchs and Prophets old 
Born of the Hebrew race 
Their testimony long and loud 
The world can not efface. 



Of Christ the Lord what need I say 
We know He came from God 
To teach all men the Way of Life 
Which path He also trod. 
Man's universal hope He knew 
He squelched our doubts and fears 
"Were it not so I would have told" 
Comes down through all the years. 



82 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Our aspirations what of these? 

For many souls aspire 

To noblest Christ-built character 

To better life and higher. 

Such souls capacities and powers 

Fruition cannot know 

While here on earth. And shall these end 

With this short life 'below'. 



And what of suffering we bear 
For each must bear their part 
Our bodies racked with mortal pain 
Deep woes the tears which start. 
"Man's inhumanity to man" 
''Nature's red tooth and claw" 
These surely speak of Better Life 
Leastways I think it so. 



As to the Globe we call The Earth 

So friendly and so kind 

Can we plow all it's mysteries 

With a poor dull human mind. 

The keen philospher of note 

— Perhaps a genius odd — 

Sums up his labored treatise thus 

''In the beginning, God" 



Therefore Creation's mysteries 
Are just as big and deep 
As is the future life of him 
Around whose grave we weep. 
There's mystery in it I admit 
And scope for faith to play 
But not m.ore so than to explain 
The life thats ours today. 



And Other Poeir.G 83 



The holy exercise of prayer 

We ever pray to be 

With Christ and with departed ones 

I^'or all eternity 

Beyond a fear or doubt we know 

Our God doth answer prayer 

Another factor in the case 

Of what av/aits us There. 



Thus Faith and Reason joining hands 

Together sing of this 

Hope universal dwells in man 

Life culminates in bliss. 

It must be so they both reply 

I''or God doth live and love 

For to Himself He must be true — 

He giveth Life Above. 



BEFORE MAKING A SERMON 



Thou Almighty Living God; Talk with me while 
I sit and think 

For I am but a creature small, And basely insignifi- 
cant. 

And Thou the Great God art and Wise, Thy Name is 
Mercy, Goodness, Love. 

My trembling spirit waits on Thee, Thou Great 
Spirit from Above. 



84 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Tis true that I a preacher am; A prophet 'mong the 

sons of men. 
Where I must think and speak for Thee. Be with 

me Lord. Be with we when 
I hide within my study walls; Consult my Bible, 

thumbworn, marked. 
And other books with themes galore. On which 

great minds have oft embarked. 



The needs of men, Lord, who can meet? Heart 

mind and will. The human soul. 
And bring these human ships to port; Mid sandbanks 

rocks and many a shoal 
But Thou God the Pilot art. With Thee on board 

no ships are lost. 
Though all must ccpe with v/ind and wave, And 

some are badly tempest-tossed. 



Then if my sermon is worthwhile, My Pilot You 

Great God must be. 
The helm of thought I yield to Ycu. The helm of 

thought please take for me. 
So now from poetry I turn: Go bad: to cold and 

reasoning prcse. 
But Thou Pilot of the Seas, My vessel guide where 

e'er she goes. 



A HYMN AND PRAYER 

Blest Word of God; Thou Light Divine 
We read Thy Pages o'er and o'er 



And Other Poems 

Thou hast the Way that leads to Life 
The path of saints who lived of yore. 
The Way of Prophets — Men of God 
Who dared to stem the evil tide 
Of maityrs brave who with their blood 
Bore witness true — and thus they died. 



Come Holy Ghost; Thou Blessed One 
inspire our hearts to dwell with Thee 
To walk along the heavenly road 
To tread the paths of service free 
Illuminate our spirits night 
Chasten the gloom and fret of sin 
Come now and seal us for thine own 
Oh enter, enter, enter in. 



Oh Christ of God; Thou Living One 
Thou Son of David. Son of God. 
Possess us 'er we go astray 
Along the path so often trod. 
Our foolish hearts. Our wayward souls. 
The world would seal and call it's own 
We seek a better way than this 
Tis known oh Christ to Thee alone. 



Cur Father God; Eternal Source 

Of all that is and e'er will be. 

Oh pity us; We are thine own 

From Sin and Satan set us free. 

Reveal thy loving living self 

We wait we worship at they feet 

Unworthy all we know too well 

But come our God and with us meet. 



86 E::i:o ;:cneca cf a Greenhorn 

THE CHURCH BY THE WAYSIDE 

(Dedicated to the Methodist Episcopal Church at 
Unique, Humboldt C::un'y, Iowa.) 

There's a Church on the Hill by the Wayside, 
Tis a landmark that's stood there for years, 
Tis the home of the souls round about it 
And the scene of our joys and our tears. 

Cho. Oh come to the Church by the Wayside 
Oh come to the Church on the Hill. 
Bring your friends, bring your folks, bring 

your kinsfolks, 
And your souls with his love He will fill. 



There the birds swell their beautiful anthems 
To the praise of Jehovah Most High 
From the trees in the grove on the hill-top 
As they solemnly point to the sky. 

Chorus. 



Tis from here we have buried our loved ones 
— Whom with Jesus now dwell evermore — ■ 
From the Fountain of Life oft come drinking 
When our spirits are wounded and sore. 

Chorus. 



Won't you come to the Church by the Wayside 
Won't you come while His mercy is free ? 
Won't you come with your sins and your sorrov/3 
For the Savior says "Gome Unto Mo." 



And Other Poems 87 

Cho. I will come to The Church by the Wayside 
Yes I'll come to the Church on the Hill 
With my friends, with my folks, with my 
kinsfolks 
And our souls with His Love He Shall fill. 



ECHO'S OF THOUGHT 

Oh God! Life is a mystery 

I may not know. I cannot se? 

Why some things are and son.o are not 

I know they're known O God to Theo 

Then there are sins which T com.mit 

The foolish thought, The caif^les^ word 

Much as I love I yet know well 

I poorly represent my Lord 



Oh God! My ways a mystery 

Unto myself. Wilt Thou nat bless 

My heart with peace. And lead me forth 

Into some field of usefulness. 

I crave not gold. I ask not fame 

Nor long I for the crowds applause. 

Some lowly task, some humble sphere 

Where best I serve the Master's Cause. 



Oh God! The worlds a mystery 
The w^ays of men with other men 
Wars tumult and the woes it brings 



Experiences of a Greenhorn 

To this I cannot say "Amen". 

Might conquers right. Hate conquers love. 

And evil triumphs over good. 

I stand abashed confounded tried 

Yet undismayed. Tis best I should. 



Oh God! Folks are a mystery 

Some are so good while some are bad. 

And others miss the Upward Look 

Or lose the faith which once they had 

Their path with briers and thorns beset 

Their life a battle ground hard fought 

They purposed well: But strength gave out 

Sin in their hearts hath badly wrought. 



Oh Christ! Thou are a mystery 
Thy gentle words. Thy wondrous life 
Thy goodness and Thy greatness too 
Alike the same in peace or strife. 
My soul with burdens sore oppressed 
Turns unto Thee: Tis gain not loss 
I leave them, lose them, at Thy feet 
Dear Christ! I lose them at Thy Cross 



A PLEA FOR PEACE 

"When the war-drums throb no longer 
When the battle-flags are furled 
In the Parliament of men, 



And Other Poems 89 

The Federation of the World." 

'I bus wrote a famous poet 

In th2 days of long- ago 

Who taught the brother-hood of man 

Ak:! W3pt o'er human woe. 

'•Whcn the war-drums throb no longer 
When the battle-flags are furled" 
When no blocd-soaked fields of battle 
Tell where legions have been hurled 
With a wild and savage fury 
— Part of war's mad reckless waste — 
At the other legions charging 
Or retreating" in great haste. 



"When the war-drums throb no longer 
When no mighty siege-guns roar 
While they belch forth lurid thunder 
And their high explosives pour. 
When the strains of martial music 
Shall not tell of warriors brave 
Massed in legions. Armed for battle. 
Marching forward. — To the grave. 



^'When the war-drums throb no longer 

Nor the dying and the dead 

Lie in heaps to tell the story 

Of a ghastly hail of lead 

When no war-horse dis-embowelled 

— Man's best slave and faithful friend — 

Maddened cries and struggles bravely 

'Gainst a cruel tortured end. 



90 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

"When the war-drun?s throb no longer 
When the sailor tru.2 and brave 
To defend his country's honor 
Need not drown beneath the wave. 
Who no lurking lord-y terrors' 
— God of Heaven stay Thine Hand — 
Shall commit the foulest murder 
Ever known on sea or land. 



"When the war-drums throb no longer 
When the nations build no more 
Giant super-dreadnaughts monsters 
Each one larger than before. 
When our armies and our navies 
— Proud and brave and they may be 
Shall on land but police the empires 
And of pirates clear the sea. 



"When the war-drums throb no longer 
When the mother weeps no more 
For the boy or boys torn from her 
To return, no nevermore. 
When the widow, — Heaven shield her 
When her heart doth bleed and break 
O'er her hungry helpless offspring 
Orphaned for their country's sake. 



"When the war-drums throb no longer 
— God of Mercy hear our prayer 
For the lands still torn and bleeding 
From the wretchedness of war. 
Pity, pity for Thy Name's Sake 
Let the battle flags be furled. 
For the sake of those still living 
And the future of our world. 



And Other Poems 91 

GOOD PIE 



She was long and lean and lazy 
Always v/ore the same old dress. 
Some folks said "She is a daisy" 
What they meant I could not guess. 
She had virtues more than vices 
Wheat more plentiful than rye. 
I refused her stale advices 
But I always ate her pie 



She was mean unto her pastor 

Often meaner to his wife. 

And her tongue would speed up faster 

Being loosed by oil of strife. 

She was meaner than the meanest 

Like a storm cloud in the sky. 

Reader of her faults thou gleanest. 

Would that you might taste her pie. 

Better tis to speak of graces 
Than to speak of peoples faults. 
Know the grace that oft effaces 
And our baser judgement halts. 
I can hold no brief for badness 
Yet I'd rather sing than sigh, 
Hence I do recall with gladness 
Not those faults that well baked pie. 



92 Experiences cf a Grosiihorn 

OPERATION ON A CHILD 

Our little boy g'ot sick one day 

We took him to a doctor, 

A first rate surgeon and M. D. 

— No spine-jab chiropractor. 

He said "There's just one thing to do, 

He needs an operation 

A^nd though all other th'ngs ycu try 

You'll come to my persuasion". 

We took our boy to hospital 

And put him on the table 

I stayed right with him through It all 

And glad that I was able. 

It took just fifteen y. >nutc2, 

Yes, five multiplied by three. 

A moments space: but seemed that day 

Etern'ty to me. 



And Other Poems 



93 




■* «# 




)» 



94 r : c::cr-2CD of a Greenhorn 

GRANDMA MALONEY 

She was aged grey and feeble, 
What we call "Well up hi yc-.rs" 
She had tasted bitter sorrow 
Shed a multitude of tears. 
Yet she was the soul of sweetness 
And her heart was filled with love, 
While her kind face told the story 
Of her faith in God Above. 

As a maiden she had married 
And a family had raised; 
One boy and two girls to love her 
While through life a trail she blazed. 
Then her helpmate pined and sickened 
Soon to cross the Jordons Ford, 
Twice a daughter hailed the Boatman 
Where his boat called Death is moored 

She was now Grandma and Mother 
And her grandchild loved her well 
Prayer and worship welcomed day-break, 
God was thanked when evening fell. 
By her neighbors she was honored 
Though her joy was most complete 
When a child cried "Hello Grandma" 
Running toward her on the street. 

That she was the Soul of Beauty 
Goes because she Beauty loved 
In her garden see her active 
Where her skill she always proved. 
Dahlias, daisies, poppies, pansies 
Lilacs, lilies, roses white 
There he helped Great Natures Artist 
Paint His pictures day and night. 



And Other Poems 95 

She dwelled with the common people 
Claimed no greatness, knew no fame 
But if goodness makes true greatness 
Greatness therefore she can claim. 
She "Has sailed" but memory paints her 
With her virtues rich and rare 
When we meet the Great in Heaven 
Gran'ma Maloney will be there. 



SMALL TOWN GOSSIP 

Dame Lashtongue said to Madame Mules 

I guess we own this town 

And; we are going to run it 

Or, we're going to tear it dov/n. 

The Church and Schools and Bank are ours, 

The Red Cross and Garage,, 

We'll rule; or ruin everything 

With a mustard gas barrage. 

And so they ran the Red Cross 

Then the Red Cross busted up. 

The Ladies Aid was next in turn. 

That straightway rusted up. 

The schools they ran until they ran 

The schools into the ditch 

In church they posed as pattern saints 

But 'nobody would hitch.' 



There are some folks who feign would run 

The world and God who made it. 

Pestiverous as mites who bite 

The egg and hen that laid it. 

Oh such as these pray you please 

Go seek a job eternal. 

We trust you just go rust or bust 

Up what;— The World Infernal. 



96 E 4-e-ierices oi a Greenhorn 

WHEN ED PAVEY SPOKE HIS PIECE 

Ed. Pavey was a white man. Just as white as he 

cculd be. 
Ed. Pavey was a Church-man and a patriot clean 

was he. 
Ed. Pavey spoke a piece one night for he was on 

the square 
When the Red Cross needed money and the boys 
were "over there". 



Ed. Pavey was a stout man but he was not stout 

enough, 
So before he went to *speak his piece' he went aside 

*to stuff'. 
He took the biggest unionalls within his well-kept 

store 
And crept inside that khaki skin with pillows most 

a score. 

Ed Pavey came upon the stage to pose as a balloon 
The audience saw the funny side but saw it all too 

soon 
They laughed until their sides just ached and tears 

came to their eyes, 
Twas the best thing they had seen for moons and 

twas huge surprise. 

And when they got to laughing so then Ed had to 

laugh too, 
But being tightly wedged in there he knew not what 

to do. 
He laughed until the khaki split, and since I am 

polite 
All I can tell you is just this. — The pillows hove in 

sight. 



And 0th 21- Poo~n 97 

Ed. Favey finished up his piece then hurried from 

the stage 
With feeling's sort o' mingled 'twixt hilarity and rage 
Just then the audience thundered forth unanimous 

applause 
And would not yield 'til Ed came back. Twas all 

for a good cause. 



I said just now they laughed until their eyes shed 

mirth-wrought tears. 
Some of those folks had not so laughed for very 

many years. 
It was an accident throughout but was just one big 

feast. 
And still they laugh when they recall Ed Pavey 

spoke a piece. 



THE LURE OF THE WlLDS 

Some folks think the city great 
And eagerly anticipate 
Or sort o' sit and antedate 

The day when they will move. 
Up from the farm they will arise 
Will leave that base of rich supplies 
Exchanged for fare of city guys, 

That fare I cannot love 



98 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

And thus with hopes nailed to the mast 
They dream that city joys will last 
And life be furious fine and fast, 

And each in order true 
Will furnish juit one happy round 
Of rampant pleasures, safe and sound. 
Since nought but good will there abound 

Nor will it say 'adieu'. 



Just wait 'till these have quit the farm 
You'll hear them chant a different psalm. 
For city life can lose its charm 

And lose it overnight. 
You can be Icnescme in a crowd, 
And city folks are kind o' proud. 
When for their virtues we've allowed 

— They smile when suckers bite. 

I would not change my lot with these, 
Give me the country if you please, 
A free-born soul is ill at ease 

Nor will ycu hear it groan. 
No lovely song-bird seeks a cage 
A forest lion hates the stage 
No human broken down with age 

A prison house of stone. 



Just send me out to plow the corn 
Beginning with the early morn 
Life's tasks each day remade, reborn 

As seasons roll around. 
Awakened by :,"roud roosters crows 
To toss down hay from well filled mows 
To slop the hogs and milk the cows, 

— A life for work renowned. 



And Other Poems SQ 



Or in the wild and wooly West 
There let me be the prairie's guest 
Or dwell on shady woodland's crest 

Inhaling Nature's breath. 
Or drop me down beside the sea 
Or 'mong the mountains wild and free. 
Give me, give me Liberty 

Yes Liberty. Not Death. 



Or let me sail where waves roll high 
Out where the wild winds tough and sigh 
Or where the lovely landscapes lie 

In splendor at my feet. 
Or let me stay where grass grows green 
Where flowers bloom and birds are seen 
And Nature sits enthroned as queen 

All else is but a cheat. 



As one small atom of the race 
I now have stated well by case. 
One firm request with perfect grace 

To make as time goes by. 
Don't crowd me in 'mong city walls 
Imprisoned in its stately halls. 

The Wilds or else I die. 
The Wilds! The Wilds! Thy voice still calls. 



THE LIGHT 

Tiz -cne! Tis gone! My faith! My faith! 
My faith in human kind. 
There is no good in all I see 



100 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Save that which is combined 

With greater ills or faults or sins 

Or cold inhuman greed. 

And this applies to all within 

And all without a creed 

Of any sort, I care not what 

Their name or church or state. 

My wounded soul; it bleeds, it dies, 

I weep, I love, I hate. 



A good share of this world I've seen 
— A cold dark world and bad. 
Unchristian Christians 'christianing' 
Course sinners wild and mad. 
Demons done up in forms of men, 
Red devils dressed in flame, 
Volcanic hells loosed everywhere 
And God seems but a name. 

Tis light! it breaks. Tis Morn; I wake 
My mind of dreams unshod 
With faith reborn and fed my these 
—My little boy and God. 



And Other Poems 10 

POEMS WRITTEN DURING THE WAR 

KAISER BILL 



Who took the lid off Hell? 

Kaiser Bill 
Stormed the earth with shot and shell 

Kaiser Bill 
With a mighty host of Huns 
Armed with burnished blades and guns 
Slew ten million mother's sons 

Kaiser Bill 

Who began the war at Liege 

Kaiser Bill 

To poor Belgium did lay siege 

Kaiser Bill 

Slew her old and helpless men 

Ravished girls and women then 

Burned the City of Louvain 

Kaiser Bill 

Who got licked at Mar-ne? 

Kaiser Bill 
And this is truth, not blarney 

Kaiser Bill 
France's sons there bled and died 
Fighting nobly side by side 
France's freedom was her guide 

Kaiser Bill 

Who sank the Lusitania? 

Kaiser Bill 
Who drowned the sons of Scandia? 

Kaiser Bill 



102 Expeviences of a Greenhorn 

Said to all the world "Now blease 
Keep your ships from off mine seas 
Or I'll sink dem all mit ease 

Kaiser Bill 



Who hates the Allie's Fleet 

Kaiser Bill 
You dare not come out and meet 

Kaiser Bill 
These brave tars of Allied blood 
For your super-dreadnoughts would 
Sink or else run home for good 

Kaiser Bill 



Your mind is filled w^ith rot 

Kaiser Bill 

You speak of "Me unt Gott" 

Kaiser Bill 

Your nightly owlish scream 

That of all you are supreme 

Is but a devils dream 

Kaiser Bill 



Who sent out his cruel "Zeps"? 

Kaiser Bill 
Over fertile fields and steppes 

Kaiser Bill 
Bombed big cities from the sky 
Though their helpless babies die 
When there was no reason why 

Kaiser Bill 



Who fears the Yankee Boys? 

Kaiser Bill 



And Other Poems IC ; 



We're not out to make a noise 

Kaiser Bill 

We are out with all our might 

For "Old Glory" and the "Right". 

By God's help we'll win this fight 

Kaiser Bill 



UNCLE SAM 

Who's the best man in the world? 

Uncle Sam. 
Who Old Glory has unfurled? 

Uncle Sam. 
Not for treasure, nor for land, 
But with purpose good and grand, 
To put down a tyrant's hand. 

Uncle Sam. 



Who was born 'mid fire and smoke? 

Uncle Sam. 
Cast aside a tyrant's yoke? ^ 

Uncle Sam. 
Plunged headlong into the fight, 
Hit out on the left and right, 
Trimmed the British over night. 

Uncle Sam. 



Who subdued the rebel band? 

Uncle Sam. 
When war-torn and sad our land? 

Uncle Sam. 



104 Exi;eriences of a Greenhorn 

Who put down a mad aggression, 
Freed the slaves from their oppression, 
Saved the union, stopped secession? 
Uncle Sam. 



And who got the Spaniard's goat? 

Uncle Sam. 
Gripped his navy by the throat? 

Uncle Sam. 
Straightway beat him to a frazzle, 
Victories won, the kind that dazzle? 
And to you this was no puzzle. 

Uncle Sam. 



Who's the champion of peace ? 

Uncle Sam. 
And his war dogs won't release, 

Uncle Sam. 
Till some maddened, war crazed guy 
To enslave mankind will try, 
Then who won't stand idly by? 

Uncle Sam. 



Who is not too proud to fight? 

Uncle Sam. 
To contend with all his might? 

Uncle Sam. 
Who's most fitted shall we ask, 
To assume this mighty task, 
To tear off the kaiser's mask? . 

Uncle Sam. 



Though this spoils mad Willie's plan, 
Uncle Sam. 



i:d 0th 2r Poems 105 



For we'll fight to the last man, 

Uncle Sam 
Though our heroes brave are dying 
And to God for succor crying, 
Yet the Stars and Stripes are flying, 
Uncle Sam. 



Who has loyal hearts to love him? 

Uncle Sam. 
And a God that dwells above him? 

Uncle Sam. 
Nought from you our hearts shall sever, 
We will stain your name, no never, 
We will love you, always, ever. 

Uncle Sam. 



Who's the best man in the world ? 

Uncle Sam. 
Who Old Glory has unfurled? 

Uncle Sam. 
Not for treasure nor for land, 
But with purpose good and grand, 
And we're with you heart and hand, 

Uncle Sam. 



THE RED CROSS 

Be ^ patriot and a man. 

Join the Red Cross. 
Don't say "You can't." You can. 



106 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Join the Red Cross. 
Some folks make a fellow sick 
Way they to their money stick, 
Come; dig up a dollar quick. 

Join the Rsd Cross. 



Little children yonder starve. 

Join the Red Cross. 
You as host your fat joints carve. 

Join the Red Cross. 
Burdened mothers God beseech, 
Hear them wail and moan and screech! 
God of heaven! Go out and preach. 

Join the Red Cross. 



Our boys in blue are brave and true. 

Join the Red Cross. 
They fight the subs, each gallant crew. 

Join the Red Cross. 
Life on board is not a joke. 
Don't you sit around and smoke, 
'Bout the cost of living croak. 

Join the Red Cross. 



And for us our soldiers die. 

Join the Red Cross. 
Or for months on sick beds lie. 

Join the Red Cross. 
Or in muddy trenches deep 
Shivering cold close vigil keep 
While at home you warmly sleep. 

Join the Red Cross. 



Thus the cause is just and good. 
Join the Red Cross. 



And Other Poems 107 

P'r'haps you wouldn't; but I would 

Join the Red Cross. 
You're not worth a hard baked cracker, 
You're a tightwad and a slacker, 
Come across and be a backer 

Join the Red Cross. 

Don't you style my musings hard, 

Join the Red Cross. 
(For a hobo helps his pard) 

Join the Red Cross. 
Be you homely or a beauty, 
Be you saint or friend of Clooty, 
Get in line; this is your duty. 

Join the Red Cross. 

You have mciiey for your pleasures. 

Join the Red Cross. 
What one day will be earth's treasures? 

Join the Red Cross. 
'Tis the plain truth that I tell, 
Come in crowds our ranks to swell, 
Hurry up! Rush in pell mell! 

Join the Red Cross. 



POEMS WRITTEN WHEN IN SCHOOL 



THe WOOINGS OF FRESHMAN GIRL 



Ccme list to me and you shall know 
Of all the little doings 

A Freshman girl at Morningside 
Experienced in her wooings. 



108 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Her dark brown hair, her browner eyes, 
Her winning smiles — a cheat, 

And hobble skirts took all by storm 
The boys swept off their feet. 



The first to fall beneath her charms 
And count himself most lucky, 

A Freshman was, like grass as green. 
You know him — Melvin Muckey. 



But when he called some later date; 

Perspired and said, "The Dickens" 
Turned pale as death and from her fled, 

For on the couch sat Wickens. 



Poor Muckey, he just tore his hair, 

He saw he was a victim. 
With clenched fists he muttered low 

"That boob, I should have licked him." 



This did seem inconsistent and 

Will so appear to you. 
On learning she stands four feet three 

And Wickens six feet tw^o. 

But Wickens quickly met his fate, 
With Muckey was a mourner, 

Of love and time and cash mis-spent — 
She now made eyes at Corner, 

Corner declared himself in love 

And wooed her with great zest, 

— Could even lose his grades for her, — 
Just then she sighted West. 



And Other Poems 101) 

"Beware, Beware," three lone hearts cried, 

She's just a cruel flirt." 
But love is blind; West heeded not. 

She said, "They're mean as dirt" 



But West soon found their words were true, 
She changed as with the wind, 

And cast around those glances keen, 
Some other dupe to find. 



She found him — Ellerd is his name. 

(Poor West he mourned his fate) 
When Ellerd in the parlor sat, 

And stayed there until late. 



Soon Ellerd thought her heart his own, 
He loved with might and main, 

He dreamed of her by day and night — 
And then she dreamed of Crane. 



But, in the steps Crane followed quick 

Of all his fallen brothers 
As Cushman did and Maynard, too 

And Fuller and some others. 

Last — Pattishall had found a "peach" 
She found a "pumpkin," too. 

For her he changed his boarding place- 
To eat and bill and coo. 

As each one told his tale of woe. 

And chewed and bit his tongue, 

The sentiment of all he said 

Was, "Gee but I was stung". 



110 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

In fact the time's too short to tell 
Of lives made sad and dreary, 

Of Seniors, Juniois, Fresh'ys, Soph's 
Who loved and lost Miss Weary. 



THE SKUNK IN CHAPEL 

Who put the skunk in Chapel ? You can't prove that 

by me; 
I was not there when it was done^ nor could I wish 

to be 
I have got some affection, and maybe lots of spunk, 
And yet I never dreamed to pet a measly little skunk 

Who put the skunk in Chapel? When it was dark 

at night, 
Went stumbling up the fire-escape; nor dared to 

use a light. 
Pushed up the window stealthily and uttered one 

loud wail, 
When he, the skunk, alighted and gently swished 

his tail. 



Who put the skunk in Chapel, chagrined our janitor, 
And had the old man search the place from top to 

bottom floor. 
Who made him work excessively; who put him in a 

rage ? 
This surely is a novel way to show respect for age. 



And Other Poems 111 

Who put the skunk in Chapel, the students to anno> ' 
The lengthening of class periods did not increase 

our joy. 
We hoped to visit in the halls instead of goinji to 

Chapel — 
Ths Faculty thought otherwise; vvith lesson.-? made 

us grapple. 



Who put the skunk in Chapel, to tease ihe Faculty? 
To hear them say, "Such beastly trick this school did 

ever see" 
To have them sit in session the culprits for to know. 
To say the joke had angered them — it's grieved them 

more I trow. 



Who put the skunk in Chapel? when our good na- 

tured Dean 
Was left responsible for all; to act that way was 

mean. 
The situation was "intense" and most embarrassing. 
Unusual skill was needed to sift out such a thing. 



Who put the skunk in Chapel ? with Prexy far away 
Gone to the East on pocketbooks of rAJIlionaires to 

play 
Who made him pound the desk (as we have seen him 

oft before), 
And say of "stink" and "stmker", "Such conduct I 

deplore." 



Who put the skunk in Chapol cur v;o:shjp did disturb 
Desires for the highest things t,was wicked thus to 

curb. 
Besides, we could not give "Nine ilahs" nor sing 

'Pride of the Sioux"' 
O'er hero's at mass mcoting: :..": \Vo ar'3 wont to do. 



— 112 Experiences of a Greenhorn 

Who put the skunk in Chapel pulled off a dirty stunt 
And no doubt in the future for a sweeter joke will 

hunt. 
Few know yet who the parties were and even if all 

did, 
There's not a man in all the school who'd "snitch 

upon a kid." _ 



And Other Poems 113 
List of Poems Page 

The Experience of a Greenhorn 4 

The OM Mill by the Dam 31 

The Ruined Dam 33 

A Rainy Sunday Afternoon 34 

''The House Beside the Road" — A Eulogy __._ 36 

The Happy Day 37 

Congratulations 39 

Soldiers of Demacracy 46 

Boys In Blue 47 

My Indulgence 50 

Sonnet on Life 53 

Sonnet on Death 54 

Sonnet on Worship 55 

Sonnet on Sin 55 

The Bed-Bug and the Bug 56 

A Rattle Snake and Another Snake 57 

The Ford Car and the Train 58 

That Tell-Tale Shoe 60 

An Ardent Lover j_^ 62 

The Night 64 

The Bull-Head and the Shite-Poke 65 

When the Kids Start Playing Marbles and 

the Birds Begin to Sing 67 



114 ri'/fieriences of a Greenhorn 

The Bull-dog and The Chain 69 

The Accident of Birth 71 

My Wishes 74 

A Satire on a Liar _-_ 75 

In Hospital 77 

Immoitality. An Argument 78 

Before Making a Sermon 83 

A Hymn and Prayer 84 

Echo's of Thought 87 

A Plea for Peace 88 

Good Pie 91 

Operation on a Child 92 

Grandma Maloney 94 

Small Town Gossip 95 

When Ed Pavey Spoke His Piece 96 

The Lure of the Wilds 97 

The Light 99 

POEMS WRITTEN DURING THE WAR 

Kaiser Bill 100 

Uncle Sam 103 

The Red Cross 105 

POEMS WRITTEN WHEN IN SCHOOL 

The Wooings of a Freshman Girl 107 

The Skunk in Chapel __^ 110 



■mS^ of congress 




015 905 5x|";"|j 



